
Class of 1971. Osama Bin Laden “Most Likely to Jihad”.
picture: dunno source, via our lol builder. lol caption: ebookace
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Class of 1971. Osama Bin Laden “Most Likely to Jihad”.
picture: dunno source, via our lol builder. lol caption: ebookace
Silence! I keel you!!
Hehehe!
Somebody was monitoring our comments, methinks!
quite possibly…
You mean the lol below with 743 posts? I’m not sure I have the bandwidth to go through all that…..
i shall summarize for you…
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“these lols suck. do you think the pk admins read these comments?”
“probably not. otherwise they’d start putting up better lols.”
Well, they actually did (when requested) come and explain the voting process better.
We do… we do read them…
Even the ICHC ones?! How do you hang on to your sanity?!
Oh… wait…
Nevermind.
Those are not too bad…maybe too cute, but not too bad. As long as you don’t read the comments. Then you just get cross vision and a migraine.
Ah yes, this bit of this thread was about the comments, not the lols. I accuse you of having read some ichc comments anyway! ;p
[LINK] Achmed the Dead Terrorist
Infidels!!! Where are my virgins? Osama promised me virgins?
Are you my virgins?!?
I hope not, there’s some really ugly dudes in here!
*blush*
I get it now, rho. I thought you were referring to PK with the “silence” thing.
I plead stupid.
My kids love this guy, especially Bubba J.
Walter is GOD!!!
The only man Achmed is scared of.
“He’s got gas…”
…on a steeeck.
Saddam’s mustard gas has nothing on a Walter fart!
LOL!!
I’m at work trying really hard not to get caught laughing my a$$ off.
Thank you I really needed that today.
*snark*
firstt
Congrats on being the first idiot to post in this thread.
faied first
failed faied
Hokay… Even if it doesn’t make perfect sense, it was still a bit funny, and I confess to doing some inane giggling. :p
If you’re not ‘Merikin, you may not get the “high-school yearbook” reference.
Good little conformists that we are, we vote on a variety of … “most likely tos,” which then end up in the yearbook.
I, for one, was voted: “Most likely to end up the queen of a double-wide.”
Of course, that one didn’t get in the yearbook …
Oh, I do get the yearbook reference, I have my own in fact, class of ’94. But thanks for the concern for a possibly ignorant foreigner. (No sarcasm here – best to point that out.)
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Nah, it’s more the jihad thing that doesn’t make perfect sense. Muslims are expected to do jihad. And in ’71 it was not used for going to attack (“offensive warfare” – can’t really think of the proper term), so it’d mean he was voted most likely to be a religiously good muslim. Which most muslims* certainly don’t think of him today. But the yearbook style thing made it fun anyway. ;p
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*) When I say “most muslims” I base that on the relatively small amount of muslims I have talked to or listened to regarding this, I cannot cite any global statistics.
Oooooon the other hand – I should possibly correct myself – the secondary school he went to apparently is secular, and what with him being a wahhabite (wahhabiot? ), wahhabist?) he could very well have been voted the most-likely-to on those points too. Meh. I’ll just go now. :p
Didn’t mean to offend at all, Danbala.
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Here’s where I think you’re right, and the word does get sticky. Of course, as a westerner, I read the word and automatically assume the “holy war” definition.
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The term “Jihad” used without any qualifiers is generally understood in the West to be referring to holy war on behalf of Islam.[5] In broader usage and interpretation, the term has accrued both violent and non-violent meanings. It can simply mean striving to live a moral and virtuous life, spreading and defending Islam as well as fighting injustice and oppression, among other things.[7] The relative importance of these two forms of jihad is a matter of controversy.
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Since other parts of the world see jihad as a religious obligation, I can see why it wouldn’t be nearly as LOL as it is here in Enlightened Japes of ‘Murrika.
“Didn’t mean to offend at all, Danbala.”
Oh, I didn’t get offended at all, it was a very reasonable assumption you made. I really did appreciate the fact that you took the time to explain it, even if it turned out to be unnecessary.
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“Since other parts of the world see jihad as a religious obligation, I can see why it wouldn’t be nearly as LOL as it is here in Enlightened Japes of ‘Murrika.”
Yeah, well… I think the wikipedia is perfectly right in that most western people primarily think about the “holy war”/terrorist version of it. I am just “damaged” from having a mother who teaches religion, I guess. :p
I think “Wahabidiot” is the term you’re looking for…
I put Wahabists in pretty much the same boat as followers of American televangelists. Same terror, small mindedness, and control, different flavor.
I was voted “Eternal Optimist” class of ’82. I am not kidding.
I was ’82 myself, but wasn’t voted anything. At least not formally.
I had to pull out my yearbook to look this up. We didn’t have any “most likely”-stuff, it turns out – the only peer votes were things like “Class Clown”, “Best Smile” and gooey things like that. (I call them gooey because I wasn’t in any of them. ;p)
The “most wanted female” in our school’s yearbook before last was a boy named Jonathan….
my high school got national press because a boy was voted homecoming queen. he’s gay, everyone knew it, he was also one of those people who everyone liked.
That is awesome…although it shouldn’t have been news at all. Good for him! We had a girl on the varsity (american)football team. People should be able to do whatever they want, if a guy wants to run for homecoming queen, have at it!
Just like “black president” shouldn’t be a big deal. He’s a person, just like any other. There’s no need to even mention his skin color.
… Wow, that was the year Lynn was born. I feel very young now.
Life beat that out of you, eh? Happens to us all…
I’m eerily fascinated by the prospect of what Uncle Fester was voted most likely to do.
suffocate on his on bile…
Okay, that’s friggin’ hilarious!
and you were likely to choke on your self righteousness… but hey, we don’t do that sort of thing in the civilised world…
I believe it was “Most likely to kill under morally questionable circumstances in defense of the realm”, but I might be wrong about that.
“I’m eerily fascinated by the prospect of what Uncle Fester was voted most likely to do.”
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Be caught in a compromising position with a sheep?
*calm down UF, everyone knows that sheep is a total slut*
lol. me likes this one…
You know people don’t give a shit anymore when we’re laughing at Bin Ladin jokes.
About what?
I think they mean “Toooo soooooon!1!!11″
Ah yes, that is a plausible translation. Thanks for the help.
Is your bin ladin with jokes?
*crumples up another bad joke, tosses into overflowing bin*
A priest, Bill Clinton, and Bin Ladin walk into a bar…
Clinton and the priest start shaking in their boots, then faint.
Bin Ladin says, “Oh look, I made the twin cowards collapse.”
*rimshot*
Thank you, the comedy team of dissimilitude and pittypat will be here all week…be sure to try the buffet!
“the comedy team of dis and pittypay will be here all week…”
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oh i hope not…
Don’t make me start singing Rush again.
FREE BIRD!
please no! anything but that!
Stairway to Freebird!!
Bohemian. Rhapsody.
Earworm!
What is love?
Baby don’t hurt me,
Don’t hurt me
No more…
In 2008, Rush performed “Tom Sawyer” on The Colbert Report, making a rare US television appearance. Before the performance, host Stephen Colbert interviewed the band and asked if some of their songs were so long that they actually influenced themselves by the end of them. The “Rush plays long songs” bit became a joke on the show, and when Rush played “Tom Sawyer,” Colbert acted like he had to go to commercial because they were going to keep playing. When they came back from commercial, Rush was still playing the song. The next night, the show opened with Colbert asleep at his desk while Rush was still playing.
Oops! Link to source for above.
To paraphrase an old joke
“A priest, Bill Clinton, and Bin Ladin walk into a bar… W ducks”
Ha!
Pretty sure we were laughing at him pretty soon after 9/11. Making a mockery of your enemies is a time-honored tradition of warfare.
too bad he didn’t have a toothbrush mustache… that would’ve great material…
“Over in Afghanistan, Osama stuck his head out of the cave and saw a shadow. So, that means six more weeks of bombing.” —David Letterman
Yeah, but those “jokes” were along the order of, “Bin Laden takes an explosive suppository… what, that was the punchline, what do you want from me?!?”
Yes, the jokes were terrible for a while. But at least people tried. It would have been terrible if it’d gone the way “RiderLeangle” seems to prefer.
“You know people don’t give a shit anymore when they are afraid to laugh at a joke”
I think we certainly SHOULD be laughing at Bin Ladin jokes, and any other jokes we damn well please. This is the land of the free. We’re Americans, and no matter how many buildings they blow up, or how many people they kill, we will STILL be Americans.
Bin Laden can bite my liberal American ass.
Wouldn’t that hurt though? I mean, I would think it would be more self satisfying to have him kiss it myself.
steve has a bit of a masochistic streak in him…
So does Lynn…
lol… good to see you back DWN…
A privilege as always.
Damn, man… I missed ya!
Not really, you winged me but I will still be able to type but not play the violin which is good because I was never much of a fiddle player.
I’ll use an expander next time…
If you’re going to do it right, go all the way I suppose.
And bin Laden can bite my conservative American ass.
Bin Laden is an assclown!
For the set of x, bin Laden can bite x American asses
So much of an ass clown, he’s avoided all our best efforts (and those of the Americas) to capture him…
I don’t think those efforts were our best. Though Dubya spewed enough “military-first” drivel to make Kim Jong-Il proud, it is plain that he didn’t use our military to its best effect. He was too hung up on ideology and face-saving to make good tactical decisions.
Perhaps because nobody tried baiting him with the right ass?
And he can bite my liberal American ass.
Isn’t it great that the right and left can come together like this?
PK: Where asses come together.
( | )( | )( | ) etc.
Q: What does Osama bin laden and General Custer have in common?
A: They both want to know where those Tomahawks are coming from!
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Q: Why doesn’t the Taliban have drivers ed and sex ed classes on the same day?
A: Because the camels can’t handle it.
lol. nice literal…
Excellent. Just excellent.
That was the laugh that could have ended my career.
No, there were a lot of us, who know the odd bit of history, who pondered before tower two fell that it was some US interventionist policy training that had just come home to roost… then we knew it was when OBL came into the frame and chief scout.
Then we pondered, as Bush declared a war on state sponsored terror on when the US would be carpet bombing parts of Maryland and some prime real estate on the North Bank of the Thames…
Spookshow have always been trouble, so I would have welcomed them being bombed back to 1840…
ah yes. defending your country is a bad thing…
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(here comes xenophobic rant from fester about why interventionism is the bane of the 21st century and all who agree that wars sometimes need to be fought are completely and utterly ignorant…)
When you put it at risk in the first place, then no, I have little sympathy…
I’ll leave the xenophobia to Americans, thanks…
No, defending one’s country would be a great thing. Sad nobody really tried it.
jihad literally means an inner struggle with in ones self to submit to god and accept divinity, its part of all Muslims faith, extremists misinterpret it and display it outwardly and force others, this is the definition we know, you just dont get it, islam is a peaceful faithm
yup. we get it…
can you please pass the idea around to some people in the middle east and south pacific? we could all really use a nice dose of peaceful faith…
Terrorists are to Islam as the KKK is to Christianity, a terrible misinterpretation of a decent belief system
amen.
Christianity is a peaceful religion too, but I wouldn’t call the crusades peaceful.
War is war no matter who you claim to wage it on behalf of.
i don’t believe that the crusades really upheld the christian beliefs or faith…
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death to the pagans and death to the infidels have the same ring… and both are wrong…
The Crusades was just a justification for the Patriarch of Venice to get very, very rich at the expense of Constantinople. Having said that, if Constantinople had done it’s job as ‘Head of the Eastern Churches’ then Islam would have been a still born sect, and thus, a simple, local war from Venice to Constantinople would have resulted at some point in the future.
As it is, the Crusades laid a pretty bloody precedent on ‘Muscular Catholicism’ and secured the power of Islam within the region to the present day… and all down to the communist teachings of dead pacifist, forged into a religion to secure and rule an Empire… which in a large part it did for Rome, the British, and, now , the American Empires…
you are just always angry at someone for something…
regardless of your revisionist version of history the crusades were wrong and went against a majority of the tenets of faith… and the stated reason was to reclaim jerusalem for the devout. the sacking of constantinople was a good way to make money, but it was not the point of the entire crusades…
btw, i didn’t know that richard the lionheart was the patriarch of venice…
how is it ‘revisionist’?
and Money was the whole point of Crusades…
BTW, do they teach that Richard was in on the First Crusades? Your educational system is AWFUL! Talk about revisionist history…
“the crusades (plural) was justification for the patriarch of venice”… therfore richard the lionheart is a good start… especially since he was english. revisionist in that you think it was about money when the whole time they were talking about jerusalem… revisionist in this case by reinterpreting other people’s motives from your arm chair a thousand years later……
Richard was an ass, but he was king… one of our worst ever.
As to the rest… I’m still waiting for the exegesis explained that one not beleivieng in Christ makes evil people die… that’s more fascinating…
that’s an easy one to explain. you just need to read the rest of the comment i left. i did not say that not believing in Christ makes evil people die, but rather that they are destroyed in the fires of hell. like i said, not a new idea in Christianity…
believe in Jesus = heaven
not believe in Jesus = hell
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please tell me you’ve heard that one before…
Yes, but not said like you’ve put it below…
What about if people believe in Jesus, but still kill non believers for it. Heaven or Hell?
Oh you did… it’s still there… no good you trying to
pull it back with additions and apologia… you
never mistakenly type something… you’ve made
that quite clear.
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But let’s have the quote
OK, I don’t believe in Christ… let the expunging of the evil ones begin!
fester, please point out where what i’ve said is different in any o fthese posts.
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one of the tenets of the Christian faith is that the only way to heaven is through Christ. it’s pretty self-explanatory…
I can’t help it if your writing skills are crap…
You said evil people will be destroyed if I
don’t believe in Christ. Never heard that
exegesis. *shrug* I think it’s skewed
theology, but no more than I’d expect from
the believer. I never knew I had so much
power as an unbeliever.
I know the Christian god gets of on torturing
people forever for slights, so I’m
conversant with the concept. It’s the power
of the unbeliever that floored me.
Oh, for crying out loud, UF, he followed that sentence with “destroyed by going to hell and not heaven”; it’s in your blockquote.
Yes, but it’s key on my unbelief…
wow. so you’re arguing about semantics now? you’re right
i should’ve used they instead of you. but my logic still stands
and you’re still stupid. so…
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and what does “God gets of on”? is that still English?
before you start throwing rocks at people for slight misuse of language you should make sure that you do not misuse it either…
I’m stupid yet you can’t construct a sentence… oookay…
and you started the rocks… I’m replying in kind… enjoy…
I’m looking forward to your next typing error
Not to put words in his mouth or anything, but I think he meant if Person X in general doesn’t believe they will be destroyed; not if one internet poster in the UK doesn’t believe that a bunch of other people will be destroyed.
And I really think you know that’s what he meant and you’re just picking at him because you disagree and/or like to toy with people when they phrase things awkwardly.
thanks dis…
but i think my quote works either way… as long as you refer to fester as evil… and assume that he’s fat enough to be conceived as more than one person…
therefore you and evil people still works… both reference fester…
Fester is capitalised
it’s a name? i figured you were referring to the build up of negative feelings towards the world festering in your subconscious…
I am thinking the semantics dickering as well but least it is fun.
Nah, just an Adam’s Family reference. Though fester is a fun word.
@dis, since you’re now simply being dumb
The offending line is in Lk 19:27, which is in
the middle of the parable I was referencing.
He claimed it wasn’t a parable, being
disingenuous, thus wanting a pissing contest.
Well, he’s having one…
what did i claim it was? what on earth are you talking about fest?
Addams… from Charles Addams… note Two Ds…
and the name, as I use it is capitalised.
I still can’t help you’re lack of ability in constructing a clear sentence.
and Wurm, the ‘semantic dickering’ is ubr’s forte… if you’ve not noticed, then you’re just not paying attention.
how did i claim it wasn’t a parable?
you claimed there not a new parable… I didn’t since it’s not… never was… I never claimed it was new, just that the exegesis was open to debate… again, we’re back to your inability to read…
correction: you claimed there it was not a new parable
curse the virus update! It grabs text…
um no. sorry fest. your sentence does not compute.
i said it was “not a new parable in the Bible” meaning that not following Christ means going to hell is gone over quite a few times…
so…
what was your point again?
and how did i say it wasn’t a parable?
please back up some of your accusations with discernible proof. i was really hoping for more of a debate than this…
Arguably it’s pretty old.
Either way, the semantic dickering is fun.
only when it makes sense and is clearly put forward…
Capital F… retard.
and diss, if you really have so little to contribute, consider looking less of a fool
Wurm can’t help it…
BTW, can you not use a shift key, ubr? It would appear not…
Interesting…
@Fester: I’m not the one deliberately misinterpreting what somebody says to me in order to pick a semantic argument…so, feel free to bite me.
You boys hash this out on your own.
nope. the shift key on this keyboard only works for
deities…
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and while you were complaining about my typing style (or lack thereof) you did not answer the questions i put forward to you… rather you just reverted to the old fester way of trying to insult the person instead of having intelligible discourse…
All in context here please.
Luke 19:26-28
Clearly Jesus supports the complete opposite of communism and socialism, and supports income inequality to the greatest extent. Further, anyone who doesn’t believe he should be king is to be murdered in front
of him.
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And here I was thinking that the vengeful God was only Old Testament.
*adjusts crown*
Good to be king…
And in all fairness, I am not contributing because I always found the heavy handed nature of religion to be rather asinine. Especially ideas like Sins of the Father and cursing bloodlines as well as eternal damnation. Eternal Damnation, does that sound ridiculous to anybody else? What on EARTH could you honestly do that would offend an infinite being so much that it condemns you forever just to make a point? A reason that makes sense, mind you…
Granted as a limited being, I can see punishing somebody forever because I cannot realistically fathom forever. Even after barely a couple hundred years, I can see myself forgetting why I was punishing them in the first place. Death is usually enough for me. If I want to torture somebody, hundred years tops.
If there were anything to answer, then I’d bother. There isn’t.
You seem to want to troll me, I’ve indulged you enough.
It’s like dealing with the other Fester trolls… nothing to engage, a lot to mock.
Offended? Kiss my ring! (_0_)
and dis you can too
Due to odd juxposition of my post, I am going to clarify my king comment. Having been referred to as the Cretin King, I thought it humorous to continue though having to explain it obvious eats all the funny…
Err… I’m not even going to ask why it’s so stretched out…
Oh noes goatse!11!!! Now I need to apply bleach to my brain.
yes fest… having to explain yourself is so tiring…
just do us a favor next time and after you write your comment click the “click here to cancel” button… it’d save all of us a lot of time…
@Wurm – Made me laugh… sorry.
@Aedriel – So he can slip the tongue in… of course!
Seems you can’t take your own advice, doesn’t it?
(_0_)
So the conversation has been reduced to “tongue my butthole!”
Nice.
Pretty much… it’s all he seems to be capable of…
uf, you really are a sore loser… i’ve defeated your ideas on three different posts now and all you can respond with is “kiss my a**”…
Oddly enough, I’ve heard of worse… Which isn’t a good thing. Now I need brain bleach because of my own babbling. @_@
@Aedriel: Tongue my butthole = religion? Ya know, that honestly makes sense in an Occam’s Razor way of reducing religion to its simplest idea.
Actually, that’s not what I was referring to, but you have an excellent point….
I have my moments of brilliance.
lol… finally got through your quote DWN… very nice…
between you and aedrial i got something positive out of this argument… haha…
DWN: Me too, but it was all safely tucked away in an anonymous cardboard box in the back of my mind. Yanking goatse out of the box of course brought along all the other ones to happily flap out onto the floor.
*shudder*
Don’t bogart that bleach, please?
I do what I can in my humble little way to help bring a little illumination into a thread. Even if I had to bring it out by the tonguing of buttholes…
Ugh, now I have cancer.
@Danbala: *passes bleach* I never need that much.
Ya think? Well, you feel free to think that.
Saying ‘I WIN!’ really don’t make it so.
There was nothing to defend from my side…
The First Crusade started out as the
Patriarch of Constaninople asking for a few
troops to help with a minor skirmish.
The Patriarch of Venice, saw a chance,
used the Vatican to whip up a frenzy
and use the ensuing chaos to loot
Constantinople. However, the justification
was wholly religious, while the underlying
cause was monetary.
The later Crusades, while ‘less’ Machiavellian
in root cause, can be traced back tot he first
Crusade as a precedent, and were largely
about Vatican tithes, rather than ‘religion’
per se, but were again justified by the
existence of the church.
So, no… all you did was make dumbass
comments about Richard Couer de Leon that
qualified for nothing better than kiss my
ring as further responses.
so…
Kiss my ring, retard.
@diss – “feel free to bite me.”
You made me LoL.
@Fester…you’re just being a dick. You know it. Everyone else knows it. Nobody really gives a shit what you think, just like you don’t care what I think. Now you just sound like a 4 year old stomping his feet because he’s not getting his way. Proceed.
Queue angry quasi-intellectual nerd rage retort.
thats because he is not
rishard also did not start the crusades
*slaps ubr*
start paying attention
no kidding… facetiousness is a trait that slaps you in the face… not the other way around…
The crusades were horribly wrong. My point was that in any group there will always be extremists. The loudest voices, or most noticeable actions, don’t always convey the message of the majority.
Damn, now I have They Might be Giants stuck in my head..
Istanbul was Constantinople Now it’s Istanbul, not Constantinople…
…and it’s nobody’s business but the turks…
That’s nobody’s business but the Turks!
REFRESH!! *headdesk*
Even ol’ New York was once New Amsterdam…
Why they changed it I can’t say…
So if you’ve got a date in Constantinople, she’ll be waiting in Istanbul!
Oh, I didn’t know they did covers.
(I only have one TMBG album, but I am very certain that “Ana Ng” is the best pop song ever.)
“i don’t believe that the crusades really upheld the christian beliefs or faith…
.”
`
I agree that they did not, but that’s somewhat of a separate issue. Whether or not they were in agreement with the professed tenets of Christianity, they happened anyway, with the apparent approval of the Church of that time. I don’t think invading a country that had nothing to do with attacking us is consistent with what I believe are American values, either, and yet…
*rings the bell*
We have a winner!
I found your site on technorati and read a few of your other posts. Keep up the good work. I just added your RSS feed to my Google News Reader. Looking forward to reading more from you down the road!
That lol reminds me of someone. Can’t think who.
Probably Bush II… he’s the last person I know who managed to drag the world into a Holy War…
Man, I just got back from voting — is it me or is every conservative joke exactly the same?
“Did you hear the one about the person who isn’t a straight white male? Turns out he or she conforms to an unpleasant stereotype!!!!!!”
Damn Freepers.
there was a conservative joke on pk? really? please give us a link… haha…
Nicely paraphrased.
And today, Obama walked into a glass door at the White house….waiting for picture to caption….waiting…
Seems Uncle Fester’s butt boil is festering again. Would someone PLEASE get a sharp needle or lance and open that prickly festering boil and let the pus drain out?
The person definitely need help even though he’d never admit it…….. that would be tantamount to submission to another’s ideas. And we all know UF would never stoop to that. Uncle Fester, eat some happy food for a change and surprise us all
The first thing that came to my mind was …where would he be graduating from at, like, 14? (Yeah, he has that in common with Dick Cheney. They both look a lot older than they are.)
Ah Osama ….. my hero !!!!
Ooooohh! Ken whit? Ken whit? Ken whit?
I’m now 17!
Old enough to drive -mwahahaha!
The roads are no longer safe……..
Thank you, thank you, thank you for my very first LOL.
I will humbly ask your forgiveness for not doing better research into Mr. Bin Laden’s age and the etymology of the word “jihad”, but would ask that you consider this fine quote by E.B. White: “Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but the thing dies in the process and the innards are discouraging to any but the pure scientific mind.”
I’m sorry for being one of those who came across as thinking less of your lol through picking on the meaning and usage of “jihad”. As I said, it made me giggle, and it still does.
Here, you can borrow this dish towel to wipe up. Your dripping sarcasm formed a little puddle on the floor over there. ;p
*generally likes sarcasm*
Eh, I actually liked this one and took it in the spirit it was intended. Sorry you had the explanation squad bear down on ya.
And just to add, I really, really like the E.B. White quote.
Barack Osama+Obama bin Laden=WIN!!!
Osama has NO class at all…