What?!
If it bothers you I’ll turn it back into water.
(Barack Obama)
Picture: dunno source, Caption: stuckhere98, via Our LOL Builder
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So. Who is this “Barack Obama” then?
So what I really meant:
Okay, I found this caption a bit funny, purely humourwise, except for its relying on the idea of the “Obama is Jesus”-idea being a reality. So … Meh. :p
Actually, that’s the very thing that I found the most amusing; it lampoons the fanaticism of…well, the more extreme segments of his proponents, and the near-messianic abilities they imbue him with!
Also, the pic itself shows him to be just what he is; a regular dude who kicks back with a beer.
Or you can read it as a sarcastic caption vis-a-vis those who say that there are those who ascribe messianism to him – since it seems far more often that his party’s opponents use the “you morons think he’s a messiah”-attack than actual supporters being even in that neighbourhood of thought.
(Oh, and after reading other people’s comments, I feel less embarrassed about my brainfart. ;p)
I will never understand where people get the “messiah” thing. I know a TON of Obama supporters, and not one single one of them thinks he’s anything even close to a “messiah.” The ONLY place I have ever heard it is from hard-core right wingers throwing it out as an accusation.
I asked for an example, once, when a lady on a comment board tossed it out there – “your messiah.” I asked her to show me just *one* example of anyone who felt that way. She gave me a link to a YouTube video which, when I watched it, was an emotional lady on the day after the election, who said that she was just so happy that this day had finally come, and she wished her mother had lived to see the color barrier broken.
Taken in context, it was painfully obvious that “this day has finally come” meant “the color barrier in the White House has been broken,” but the lady who sent me the link insisted that the woman in the video was referring to the “Second Coming” of Jesus.
It’s just amazing to me how far the notion has spread when it’s based on nothing whatsoever – at most, based on Oprah saying Obama’s “the one” (which, again, was pretty clearly in reference to “the one who’s got what it takes to break the color barrier”).
Truly weird. If people don’t like his politics, why can’t they just argue his politics, instead of insisting (with zero evidence) that his supporters think he’s a deity?
Shameless link. And yes it is a blog, but it’s a blog of all the Obama = God from left wingers.
one more shot here:
obamamessiah dot blogspot dot com.
Today’s linky brought to you by the word PARODY, and the number eleventy.
Hey I said shameless…..
i like shameless
bitter troll has no shame, or pants…pants are for the weak
No!! Pants are for those people with something to hide!!
so thats why obama wears pants huh? to hide the fact he is a double secret muslim
No he wears Mommy Jeans!!!
@Peanut Butter — fyi, if you use the deformed parenthesis {and} put your cite in that without spaces at either end, then it doesn’t get trip the filter and it’s easier to cut and paste into a new browser window than when the site addy is spelled out with excess spacing and all the usual
Tried that, it kept disappearing. It’s a damn conspiracy I tell you.
Use html code. It always comes through that way.
I’m going to try this one last time
Remove spaces.
clickable words here
Ok, you want to clue us in as to what code you’re using? Not all of us are html aware..
-Sighs and gives Eddie a hug-
It’s like this, sir.
Sorry if I scewed up the spacing at all and my bold html is showing.
Title the visitor sees.
You use this code:
a href=“http://Internet URL goes here.”>Title the visitor sees.</a
But you need to add a after the last a.
Also, see this link.
Img src coding doesn’t work here, FYI.
test
Title the visitor sees.
“…deformed parenthesis…”
*sob*
{} -> curly brackets
-> angle brackets
[] -> square brackets
sometimes called braces instead of brackets
* this public service announcement brought to you by your friendly neighborhood programmer. we now return you to your regularly scheduled lolz, already in progress
meh,
<>
HTML FTW
too much info. computer geek overload.
my work here is complete!
don’t sob, just was trying to keep it simple enough that even a cave man could understand
love the html stuff up above — thanks for sharing
thanks bf! sorry for the tears – my inner, anal-retentive-programmer side just got the best of me for a while.
“deformed parenthesis” is actually kinda funny
I think those sentiments are echoes from election/inauguration night. There were way too many people who really did call themselves saved. It was odd. I don’t pretend that all democrats/left-wing/ people are like that just that it did happen. That being said I lean right and even I’m getting tired of the messiah accusations.
Tell you guys (on the left) what: You stop trying to pretend that Rush Limbaugh is the leader of the Republican Party, and we’ll stop referring to Obama as “Your Messiah”. Deal?
*figures this will fly like a lead balloon*
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If the lead is thin enough, and the ballon is filled with Hydrogen…. it’s a slight possibility.
Mythbusters !!!!!!!!!!!
Not actually sure if I can commit to this… Must. try….
Rush is the messiah….. or Obama is the leader of the Republican Party… there I combined the two, choose which you like.
oooooo! I like what you did there!
Barack Limbaugh is the Messiah of the Demublican Party
No, no, no, it’s Rush Obama of the Republicrats.
Well, then I would have to say that a big mouth would come in quite handy.
slic that would be tongue big tongue, or else we need to change the name to Demondicks.
You’re going all technical on me, aren’t you?
Engineer, it’s what I do.
Well you know, a big mouth could imply a big tongue… As a matter of fact, it would be pretty weird to have a big mouth and a little tongue, don’t you think?
I don’t know there’s too much weird in the world. I can’t assume anything, I assumed people knew Obama was very liberal, yet the moderates voted for him anyway.
I just went to lunch with a dude who calls him “that fu(king saint righty.” I kid you not.
HI!! I’M BARRY BIGMOUTH AND THIS IS CILIT BANG!!
Oh froo, you can’t control the crazies on your side any more then I can control the crazies on mine. Good solid try though.
Well okay…but doesn’t that leave you with Michael Steele?
We do not claim him. Yet.
I can’t say I blame you.
ROFL
you’re on, froo, as soon as he stops making the “leaders” of the GOP apologize to him for any form of denigrating remarks they may have made
Considering he didn’t “make” anyone do anything, I’d say you’re on shaky ground there, sir.
And he wouldn’t make himself the winner of the Republican primary in 2012 if he ran, either. And yet the fact remains that it would probably be a landslide if he ran as the head of the Republican ticket; and elected Republicans have had to choose between continuing their career as an elected official, or standing behind their disparaging remarks against Rush Limbaugh.
I’m not accusing you of even so much as liking the guy, I’m just sayin’, people who over-idolize Obama deserve to be mocked, as does the Republican with more national, popular support than any elected official (besides Obama), but who happens to be a pundit with his own radio show.
Are you talking about Rush running as the head of the Republican ticket? Because that would never happen, for two reasons. One, he’s too polarizing to get enough votes, and two, he doesn’t want to take the pay cut. The REpublicans had to retract their statements against Rush because they knew they were untrue, unfair, and stupid, and if they wanted to keep the respect of their constituents (most of whom listen to Rush on a daily basis…..he has the largest fan base in radio after all), they needed to straighten up and fly right, and quit trying to pander to the Left. They retracted because they were wrong, not because anyone “made” them.
I absolutely agree that it isn’t going to happen because he wouldn’t want to take the pay cut.
And I am sure he would polarize the general electorate, but I can’t imagine that Rush would not solidify the Republican party; he would have all the popular support of Palin without sending the more intellectual voters running to vote for someone else.
As for the retractions for being “wrong”, I think that largely a matter of opinion; I happen to agree with the majority of what was said.
every1 knows rush not leader of repubrikans, he leader of deceptokons, transforms into space tank
Rush can’t turn into a tank. He can transform into a painkiller addict. Does that count?
And I can transform into the IPOD HUMAN! (link.)
wha? a lumber pill popper 400 pound shaved bigfoot dont count as a tank? and he real spacey when he on his drugs. SPACE TANK!
Lawlz
They believe he can massively spend our way out of debt and out of financial trouble. They believe he can dispense health care to all those without it, while lowering costs and increasing competition. They think he can spend trillions he doesn’t have without inflating the dollar. To pass the most draconian cap and trade bill but NOT have costs for the regular joe (who was supposed to get a tax CUT remember? 95% were?) skyrocket into the stratosphere.
Yes, Obama supporters expect Obama to do the absolutely impossible – things that only a God could ever hope to do. And all by virtue of silly mantras like hope and change! If you don’t see why this looks like ridiculous worship from the outside, I’m sorry, but it indeed does. That’s all it looks like.
And after 8 years of hearing that BUSH of all people was my golden boy, my hero, my dream man, when he was NOTHING of the sort; guess you get to see how the shoe feels on the other foot for a while. You people who like what he’s doing or believe the lies he’s telling as he’s telling them – you look as dumb as any cultist right about now who ever drank the kool-aid.
I’m surprised they posted this lol or that it got the votes. But whoever did it, kudos. It’s the best one to make it to the top in a while.
Hrmm… I don’t expect much from Obama, other than him to be president. I can expect him to do all I want, but I’m not getting all excited. It’s more of a cynical hope that he’ll make the country better, even a little bit.
Yeah, except:
Universal coverage IS the way to cut costs (less bureaucracy)
The trillions are borrowed, not printed, which is a different problem but no inflation, not to mention that the problem they are trying to solve and the massive existing deficit are both Bush problems (Right wingers, it appears, are no longer very good at even not spending money)
Environmental legislation is important for the environment, but has further justification in that the retooling needed stimulates the economy
What happens when our lenders stop lending because we don’t pay them back? (as China has threatened to do, as they laugh at little Tommy Boy trying to say that “Dude, we’re totally good for it!”) Then, the only recourse we have is to print money, whcih causes inflation, which hurts the economy more, which causes the need for raised taxes (outside of the taxes already raised to pay for what little they intend NOT to borrow), and the shit hits the fan. Again.
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Universal coverage is not the way to cut costs. Tort reform will be a great place to start, since most of the redundant testing that doctors do is to cover their asses in the case of a malpractice suit. “Well you didn’t do enough tests to find that tumor!” even though the tumor was deeply hidden and the only way to find it was for it to start taking over. “Well you should have seen that aneurysm about to happen!” even though the blood vessel was in a part of the brain that is difficult to get to. Therefore we have overdone and redundant testing so that’s one less route the trial lawyers have to take when trying to “stick it to the doctor” who makes more money than they do (and immediately pays it out in malpractice insurance).
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Also, we need a system whereby we can customize our own medical insurance, like we do with car insurance (if they insist on using that tortured metaphore in Washington, indulge me for a minute while I do the same). This will allow for actual competition (instead of the Federal and State mandates that say EVERYTHIGN has to be covered), and will lower prices for insurance drastically. Then more people can afford it, and the 10% who don’t have it or who don’t want it now can get it.
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90% coverage sounds a hell of a lot better than “43,000 uninsured people in America”, doesn’t it, especially when you consider the breakdown of that 10%…….illegals, rich people, and people who have opted out for whatever reason.
I know. It is truly terrifying. I live in a small town in Tennessee, and I cannot even begin to tell you the number of people who have tried, in all seriousness, to convince me of one of the following:
a) Barack Obama is a Muslim!
b) Barack Obama wasn’t even born in the US!
c) Barack Obama is a communist!
d) My uncle’s cousin’s son told me he saw Barack Obama NOT SALUTING to the PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE!!!!
Etc., etc. It is really hideous how unintelligent people will believe things with absolutely no logical proof.
You did see the news yesterday, didn’t you?
Unintelligent, eh? There’s video of Obama refusing to salute the flag during the national anthem. So much for intelligence.
As in, “here is a link” behind my name of Obama refusing to salute. He’s always hung around with the kind of people who like to bomb federal buildings as opposed to, you know, saluting the flag. Go figure.
He’s showing respect.
It’s a little known fact that you’re not supposed to do -anything- during the anthem, even correct yourself if you didn’t cover your heart (-not- salute, that’s for uniformed members of the military) in time before the singer started performing.
Even if he had corrected himself, people would have called him out on being late, or fidgeting during the performance.
And even if it was just an honest mistake, it happens. He’s a man, not a god or a devil as the varying sides attempt to cast him
I mean, really. It’s not like he’s farting on the flag or making faces. And there are plenty of shots of him covering his heart other times… so what happened there? His terrorist leanings only kicked in this one time?
There are pictures of JFK, Bush, LBJ, almost any president you can think of not covering their heart for the pledge. It’s just that only in our modern, paparazzi society do we find the time to dig them up and put them on the news.
Now, before you call me a raving Obama fan. I voted for him, yes, but not until the general election. He was not my candidate. I simply preferred him (even with Biden tagging along, ugh) to McCain/Palin.
But to criticize anyone, even Bush, on such a one-time event, and then to think you’re being clever and not derogatory by including his middle name, even? Pure, raving, idiocy.
I would take it more as his megalomania on display – this is the year the seas lower and the earth begins to heal type statements for starters. The guy sure thinks a lot of himself.
As do you… so I think the two of you are even.
Keep sipping that kool-aid, Max.
the same kool-aid bush was feeding you for 8 years?
That’s a good one. I bet nobody has ever used that before…do you mind if I write that down and share it with my friends?
I think she copy righted it. Be careful she could take you to court. Judge Judy does not look kindly on copy right infringement.
judge judy makes bitter troll hot
It seems to me it’s actually his detractors who think he is the Messiah. They seem to expect miracles and were complaining that he hadn’t ‘fixed’ everything after only 21 days in office!
Obama is the complete opposite. Ever hear of the Anti-Christ?? America voted him in. Aren’t we all getting smarter??? |:(
i disagree, i happen to find it revolting that someone would joke about B.O. being Jesus
I think he’s the President of a corporation, or something. Like Bill Gates. I dunno. Haven’t really been paying attention.
Aah. That’d explain why I haven’t heard of him. I don’t follow financial/industrial news at all.
1-joke fail
2-joke explanation fail
3-joke reply fail
4-double joke reply fail
MOSTLY reading comprehension fail on my part.
Step one – Joke fail
Step two –
Step three – PROFIT!
With the way the governments acquiring companies, you may be more right than you think.
I think the real question is, what kind of beer is he drinking? From what little we know of his personality I’m thinking an Import.
*snerk*
It’s honeyed mead= you know Islam doesn’t allow drinking spirits from grain !
*snerk*
It’s also why he can’t touch his dog.
No that leads to hairy palms and blindness!!!
Arugula flavored.
Again with the arugula!!!! LOL
She’s just being a copy-cat, Eric
If he has any sense whatsoever, it’s an import. :p
(Yeah, I know there actually are a few almost drinkable ale-like brews from your side of the Puddle, but damn, most American beer is useless. ;p)
Seconded!!
> So. Who is this “Barack Obama” then?
Best first ever.
I thought it was way too childish.
Naw, it was cute. ^_^
Yeah. Stupid troll. Oh wait, sorry.
Hehe, I like the caption. The only appropriate way of dealing with ridiculous strawmen is to capture them.
Oh, you mean it goes the extra lap around? In that case it’s much more funny than I first read it as. I probably should take a break from this stuff.
That’s how I read it. Poking fun at the idolators.
On re-reading it after Lilith’s post, I read it more as poking fun at those who try to say that there are others who think he’s the Messiah.
Now I am utterly confused.
What idolators? Can you show me one?
I think Czernobog meant Adulterers. You knoow how they are… having their… adulteration about Obama.
One?
Perhaps you misunderstood me. By “idolators” I meant “people who, during Obama’s campaign, built him up far beyond what his qualifications and policies (such as they were) warranted, and who’s faith in his ability to deliver the U.S out of dire economic and geo-political straits seemed to be based more on blind devotion then on his track-record (such as it was.)”
That never happened. CITE please!!!
Cite? really? check the back of cars, people made him the face of “hope” and “change”. One man, one mission, change the world in one to two terms as president…..Barack “Hope” Obama stars in this years thriller: Degradation of Privately Owned Business and Their Federal Take Overs. Summer 2009!
Read sarcasm fail..
hurray! I was afraid that it might have been serious. I would rather risk a sarcasm fail then let something like that go unchecked.
that is called campaigning…not idolatry
And you don’t think Obama took it one step further. Well the DNC took it one step further?
I thought we were supposed to set them on fire. Of course, I could be confusing strawmen with zombies again…
No, no for zombies you need to remove the head or destroy the brain. Although I suppose setting them on fire would be fun and effective at the same time….
How come in old zombie movies the parts would continue to crawl after you. Ashes, I tell you. Ashes can’t eat your brain.
Or prop up ridiculous arguments that have to bearing in the current discussion. Either way is a win really. In fact, I think lighting things on fire is a great way to deal with most situations…
What?
Yes, yes, fire, fire, fire!!
Settle down, Beavis.
You asswipe! I was about to have a wet dream!
I AM CORNHOLIO!
huh huh huh hey baby huh huh wanna wrestle?!?!
DO NOT make my bunghole angry.
bunghole burns with a firey rage
I need holio for my bungholio!!!!!!!
Eric, Bad boy. You need TEEPEEE FOR MY BUNGHOLE
MY PEOPLE, WE HAVE BUT ONEEE BUNGHOLE!
However, I remember this one zombie movie that after this funeral director got a zombie that died, he creamated the body and the ashes that came out of the chimney sprinkled on the graveyard and revived the dead. It was a cheesy movie all around, but apparantly they weren’t safe from zombie ashes.
I know the movie you’re talking about Night of the Living Dead 3 or 4. They had Zombies in canisters from the Cemetary in NoLD and the seals broke or something. It def was cheesey.
So how exactly did they resolve that problem?
Besides, that would mean you could get the zombie infection from merely brushing up against a zombie, or one bleeding on you, when usually it’s only zombie bites.
The zombie came back alive and ate people I believe, but it was like years ago. And when they burn the bodies it releases the virus in the air and the last scene is ands coming out of graves or something… Corny.. but still C-Movie horror classic.
If you take off the head it may crawl after you but it’s no longer as big of a threat, light it on fire and you have a flaming zombie-torch chasing you. Take off it’s head THEN set it on fire and enjoy the show from a safe distance, that is the best solution.
This public service announcement brought to you today by your friendly neighborhood internets.
How can a head crawl after you?
With it’s teeth. Duh. Never underestimate a zombie in need of brains.
I was kind of afraid to ask, I was thinking maybe their brains would morph into feet or something. Of course once they got you and ate your brains, how would they digest them? So many questions…
Maybe it just rolls.
Tis only a scratch, man!
Come back and fight! I’m only a head!
It’s always best to quit while you’re a-head..
This is not a time to lose one’s head
Or as my dad always said, “Don’t lose your head over a little piece of a$$.”
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My dad, he was a great guy and had sage advise.
We’re just glad he had the thyme, eds.
My dad said “If you get a girl pregnant, you’re fvcked in more than one way!”
Sort of like a fat man who fell down?
)
The body will. That’s the point of it taking off the head making it less dangerous, it no longer has anything to bite you with and can’t infect/consume you.
Well ideally you have your compound lined with explosives and you blow them up first. After that you can light the trench filled with branches and shrubbery that rings your property to take care of the pieces.
If you’re using explosives you need to be inside or if not, under an umbrella.
Well, they were remote detonated of course. We’re going to need flame throwers to take care of the pieces that escape the blast and moat of fire, of course.
I always thought it would be funny to watch zombies try to run(or walk if these are the older, slower versions) through a minefield.
28 Days Later….
I never saw that movie.
Oooh, you should!
Run, don’t walk to your local video store…
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The scene near the beginning where he wakes up from the coma in the hospital just….I get chills thinking about it. It was filmed perfectly.
I may actually have to rent that, it looks pretty enjoyable.
Wow, from the trailer it reminds me of the movie “Legend”.
Sorry, “I am Legend” I think…
ROFL….href=http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089469/>Legend, not so much….
Don’t be discouraged, dissimi, it takes a time or two to get it right…
Well, I fu(ked that up….
*sigh* Legend
Don’t you love HTML? It’s so intuitive…
/sarcasm.
Is that the one where the zombies run? Yeah… they’re pretty freaking scary shambling towards you slowly and overwhelming you with sheer numbers. I don’t need them moving faster than me on top of that.
Yes, it is sick scary! They also scream real loud.
28 Days Later was excellent! The sequel, however, was a big fat fail.
SB: What do you mean big fat fail: **SPOILER ALERT**
We find woman who is immune to the Rage Virus and bring her to a lab without Quarantine. Let her kiss someone. Then when the rage is loose lock ALL the civilians in a basement with two exits and not guard them. TOTALLY WIN!!! WIN!!!
****ADDITIONAL SPOILER ALERT******
And how ’bout the super-resiliant zombie dad? Just when I thought he was gone for good, he popped up again…and again…and again…
“The only appropriate way of dealing with ridiculous strawmen is to capture them.”
`
How bout a little FIRE, Scarecrow?
/wicked witch
*throws water*
*cackles merrily*
Help! I’m melting! Melting!
All my beautiful badness!
Oh, what a world!
*dissolves*
I like it. Republicans shouldn’t take people’s messiah jokes seriously! We’ve had to live with their ‘choice’ man for the last 4 years, so……live with it.
Umm, if I’m remembering correctly, didn’t we live with their choice for eight years??
unfortunately.
Well, he wasn’t *CHOSEN* for the first four.
At last, he has been “chosen” by a real majority.
You don’t have to have majority to win. It’s all electoral college. That’s how it’s been for centuries. It’s to make sure that the highly populated cities can’t outvote, say, Montana, lol
Vote-wise, Obama only beat McCain by a few million (considering that we have over 300 million people, that’s not too many) majority-wise.
Thanks, but I’m pretty sure everyone here is well aware of that fact…that’s kinda the point of the comment you replied to.
The Steve, I was replying to JadedCynic and ThatGuyAgain.
Don’t worry, I try not to be too redundant when I reply, like when I’m replying to JadedCynic and ThatGuyAgain.
Unlike Clinton, you mean?
A majority of what? Informed voters? Dead people? Reanimated corpses? What?
good point…..haha my bad.
My bad? Jesus Christ. No wonder we’re so fu(ked.
Epic fail.
I’m not even republican, and I don’t like this one.
Stoopid cuts across party lines. Quayle and Biden — separated at birth?
Awww, let’s do a reunion show. They can hug and cry and misspell things.
Behind the Politics: The Gaffers!
*Prays for Imax release*
Now THAT would be something I can believe in.
BWAHAHAHA!!! Nice.
/can we start voting for Vice President separately?
IIRC, it used to be that the guy who lost the election was vice president. So if we still did that McCain would be Obama’s VP.
That might have been better in this case.
That’s funny–it’s a good way to never get anything done. Boo hiss progress!
Soon the arguing and trolling will start…
… and i’m too sick to enjoy the camp out. hope someone else brought the hotdogs.
Never fear, dearest one! I even splurged and bought the kosher hotdogs!
fancy!
I’m allergic to Kosher….
You weren’t invited *sniff*.
Come, my lovely Short. I brought you special things. Dijon mustard for the kosher hotdogs. Lobster salad, made with lobsters flown in from Maine. Godiva chocolate for the s’mores. And only the best: Sta-puft marshmallows! And none for that Peanut Butter fellow! *sniffs again*
godiva chocolates you say?! i less than three you!
although, right now what would hit the spot is grandma’s homemade matzo ball soup. best “sick kid” remedy ever.
Wouldn’t want it anyhows. Probably got the hot dogs from NYC (liberal), Lobsters from Portland, ME (liberal), and Godiva from San Fran (WAY liberal), so to me it’s a liberal picinic, and I would loose my moderate conservative card if I partook…. so sniff this (_l_).
Even FOOD is right and left with you? Jeebus crispies. Talk about a stick up the butt.
Mmmmm, lobsters. I don’t care for Godiva over much. Most chocolate in the country, even the expensive brands, all have soy in them anymore. Makes them waxy. We sell this great chocolate at the bookstore I work at that is fair trade and made with all natural ingredients. I’d link the brand name for you but I can’t remember it. It is the most delicious chocolate in the history of chocolate.
NOTHING and I mean NOTHING (I love caps
) is better than the chocolate river in Willy Wonka’s factory.
Well, it’s Willy Wonka so I doubt it has soy in it, so you may be on to something.
However there is a fat little german boy…
Thriller!!!!
“It is the most delicious chocolate in the history of chocolate.”
`
Ghirardelli Bittersweet?
*swoons blissfully*
They changed chocolate standards. Check the ingredients and I bet it has soy in it now. At least the Ghiradelli we sell at the store does.
Jane, you have to cough up that chocolate brand name at some point in the next couple days!! Chocoholic PK’ers everywhere are counting on you!
Our resident suicide blonde figured it out for me, it’s Dagoba chocolates. I’ve had their milk chocolate with hazelnut and dark chocolate with espresso beans. It’s great, when you look at the ingredients on the back there’s not a single unpronounceable or unfamiliar thing listed.
Is it Dagoba, Jane? They make an amazing variety of delicious, quality chocolate, not waxy at all.
If any of you chocolate lovers have a Cost Plus/World Market nearby, they also carry a wide array of fantastic chocolate. I bought a bar there recently, it was dark chocolate with rock salt. It sounds kinda gross but it was amazing for that sweet/salty combo!
Do they also sell small green masters of the force?
EXACTLY what I was thinking too, Max.
Dagobah FTW?
YES!!!! That’s it! Mmmmmmmmmmm…
DUDE COME ON!! That was TOTALLY sarcastic….. I was playing along with you…. who has stick up what now?!?! :-p
Well of COURSE food is left and right! Just look at those snobs eating their arugula and Kobe beef! THey’re not proles like the rest of us! *munches on iceburg lettuce and dirt*
froo: I know you’re knocked up, but didn’t think you were a rabbit… (almost forgot the t, and I think calling you a rabbi wouldn’t quite work).
“munches on iceburg lettuce and dirt”
`
You forgot the spray-on Velveeta.
And the fried bologna sandwiches, mmmmmmmmmm.
Deep. Fried. Twinkies.
With Beluga and Dom on the side.
*you can take the trash from the trailer park, et. al*
Or Deep Fried Snickers, oreos, pretty much anything deep fried, even a metal pole.
Pickles….
With Grey Poupon.
Deep fried pickles! w/aioli
Fried Tums?
Damn, Tessie, we don’t put the Velveeta on the lettuce. We put RANCH on the lettuce. And bacon.
The Velveeta goes on the fried bologna sandwich mentioned by slic….
Look, if the salad doesn’t contain at least 12,000 calories, it’s not a good salad! *pours on the Thousand Island, cheese, and bacon bits* Does anyone have any sausage I can add to this thing?
Hell, here’s a whole pizza.
But then it’s not a healthy salad. Pizza is bad for you. *adds chili and chips to salad*
That’s not salad. That’s hog slop.
You forgot the croutons.
Right. Because this alleged “salad” needs more shit on it.
Hey! Take that lettuce off mine!
DT, apparently you’ve never had a “real” taco salad. It’s the food of the gods, honestly. And needs to be consumed with a bucket of Tums next to you.
Screw that. I don’t want any green shit getting in the way of that sweet, sweet flesh…
and visa-versa..
Sweet, sweet flesh? We can have that on a salad? Yay!!!
Mmmmmmmmm, rare steak on a salad. Or, just rare steak. Mmmmmmmm……*Homer drool*
“Mmmmmmmmm, rare steak on a salad.”
`
Ever hear of something called a “black and blue salad”? Thin strips of Black angus beef and crumbled blue cheese. The name is a bit S&M, but the taste is…
*nom nom nom*
MMMmmm!
“The Velveeta goes on the fried bologna sandwich”
`
I thought the fried baloney sangwich got Miracle Whip?
Well, you can, if you want to….it’s not required.
but froo, you really should try a nice arugula laced salad with your venison steak. the flavors complement each other so well, besides it’s just so much fun to torment the lefties that way
LOL, true. I really need to try aruglula. I hear about it all the time on Food Network, and it sounds really interesting. And it’s fun to say! Arooooooooooogulaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!
It reminds me of those old fashioned car horns, AAAAAAARRRRROOOOOOOGAAAAA!!
Arugula always reminds me of Vinnie Antonelli in My Blue Heaven, when the grocery store manager asked if there was anything they could do to improve his shopping experience:
Vinnie: Arugula. I haven’t had arugula in six weeks.
Supermarket Manager: What’s that?
Vinnie: It’s a vegetable. The funniest part, to me, is the way he pronounces vegetable very slowly and clearly with four syllables, apparently to make sure the supermarket manager gets it.
Best. Line. Ever.
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Lol…What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?
Hee hee! *refuses to spoil the joke*
My Blue Heaven was such a great flick.
Yeah!
In my family, for a certain type of person we might describe them as someone who “has a method for eating pancakes.”
You have something against books?
It’s not tipping I believe in. It’s overtipping.
You know, sometimes I even amaze myself.
If food is right and left then allow me to present, the centrist food. The REAL Maverick….
*holds up a box*
IIiii’ve goooot Doooughnuts!
*perks up*
Do you have the kind with chocolate on top and custard in the middle?
*sidles over to Max sniffing hopefully*
Boston Kremes?
Yeah, we have those too.
TROGDOR GETS ALL THE PLAIN GLAZED. -Snorts HUGE plume of fire-
Although, now, what with our evil communist plot to destroy the world, should we rename them Kommunist Kremes?
Boston = Liberal…. Not as centrist as we thought. I want my FREEDOM FRIES!!
Those, being my favorite Jane are in short supply, mainly cause I keep them in my doughnut safe.
Yes, I AM your favorite Jane and I AM in short supply. Now, about those doughnuts…
*snaps to attention*
Doughnuts?
Perhaps even, miniature powdered white sugar doughnuts?
Hey, look over there! Bright shiny object!
*steals miniature doughnut*
nom nom nom nom nom…
Lobster salad, you say? I [hiney] you.
I hate it when I’m right -.-
I hate it when I’m left.
LOL at that…
FIRST
SECOND
THIRD
Yes you are an epic worthless fail.
Fourth
gag
Obama drinks a beer….whoopdee f*cking do!!!! What’s next??? A news report on when he takes a sh*t???
That will actually create a White House press release which will send chills down the legs of MSNBC newscasters…
And this caption made me throw up a little bit…
Sarcasm recognition fail.
um….no.
Recent White House Disclosure Reveals His Shit Indeed Does Not Stink.
lol
They smell like bakery fresh cinnamon rolls.
Family Guy FTW!
And, Should You Lean A Little Closer You Shall See What Roses Really Smell Like.
M-Hm.
Don’t it’s a trip, I mean trap!!!
I really like having a President who can handle a beer. Now show us that you can eat a pretzel without chocking. It would probably take several beers before our current president is anything like the last one.
oops, spelling fail – choking
I dunno, I think it would be pretty cool to see a President chock with a pretzel. If he (or she) can do that, they can rule the woyald!
-sits behind his desk looking very stern- this just in, president obama takes a poo…and it stinks to high heavens….film at 11
A witch!
And what do you do with witches?
BURN THEM!
And what do you burn besides witches?
MORE WITCHES!
BURN HIM ANYWAY!!!
>.>
<.<
^.^
Win
If he was so great, he would not need defending.
If he were so horrible, people wouldn’t need to invent false rumors or ideologies as a basis for attack.
But haven’t they already done that? lol
Thanks again, Captain Obvious. That is what eee was implying.
I’m a Captain? Hells yes! Now I can sentence people to eternal suffering… I mean, the wonderful world of marriage.
What’s false about the fact 3 or 4 of his appointees hadn’t paid their taxes, including the one who was to be in charge of the IRS. Or better yet nominating an obese person to be Surgeon General (at least she ain’t a smoker). Or lying on a continual basis, expecially about earmarks and the Stimulous pacakge, or transparency. Or even being a hypocrite in terms of energy usage (Oval office lmost 80 in winter, and 68 in the summer), or asking Americans to make sacrafices in an economic crisis, and then going to NYC on tax payer money to meet his wife for date night, how about bowing to Kings of foreign countries, and apologizing for America every chance he gets…. I can go on and on….
Now, now, let’s not forget the good he’s done. He did a bang up job of reading “Where the Wild Things Are” to those kids.
68?? I’m dying over here at 74!
You could go on and on, but your spellchecker would probably burn out before you finished…poor thing.
Wow gee wilikers, can’t dispute the facts attack the poster…. that’s a new tactic from the ignorant, now ain’t it… **WANKER**
Steve’s trollin’ about for anyone who’s danglin’ a little bait today, it appears…
“anyone who’s danglin’ a little bait”
`
possible dick joke?
Couldn’t we all just have s’mores guys?
I’m sick of s’mores….. me want Jack and Coke and some Hooters Wings…
Or just Jack and coke and Hooters…..
Appointees made “mistakes” on tax returns – shame on them. They were wrong. What does that have to do with the man who appointed them?
Nominating an obese person for surgeon general – so you think discrimination based on weight is acceptable? I don’t.
Lying about earmarks – I recall the statement he made being that there were less earmarks than any previous spending bill including those under Republican administrations (which was true, but there were still a load of earmarks) He’s a politician, what do you expect?
Energy use in the Oval Office – 80 in the winter? If that’s true, I would like to see them become more energy conscious. I doubt that one of the presidential tasks is setting the thermostats in the Oval Office however.
How is date night in NYC any different than the previous presidents trips to Camp David, etc.? It all costs money, and it’s all funded by the taxpayers.
P.S. – Your points have been refuted and/or agreed with, and your spelling still sucks.
And 80 degree Oval Office sounds like it would lead to a lot of sweating. And a 68 degree Oval Office would be downright cold!!
Do what Carter did and wear a damn sweater! lol
FTR, that’s the first time EVER I’ve ever heard a conservative suggest anyone on the planet do anything Jimmy Carter did.
lol
Hey we have a black president, anythings possible, next we’ll have a hispanic on the supreme court…
)
It will most likely be the last.
I wouldn’t say that. I would like to see someone like J.C. Watts run for president.
Dude when I first read that I thought you were posting a reply to me about Obama being the last Black President. I was like, damn slic that’s even low for you.
Awwwww, I would never say that, I’m glad we have a black pres, just why did it have to be THIS ONE??!! (Pssst, also I’m a dudette)
I call everyone dude, even my daughter, so please don’t take it personally.
ditto lol
np, dude!! lol
ok we live in the future with black president, now where is the flying cars and robot slaves to do bitter troll’s bidding. make bitter troll sandwich rosie!
Appointing someone to be in charge of the IRS who made a $43,000 mistake does not seem very bright.
Appointing someone in charge of the national health welfare of the country who is not physically fit herself seems kind of silly. Im pretty sure I wouldnt hire a fat personal trainer if I was looking for one.
Earmarks…Obama said there would be none. It doesnt matter what past presidents have done he still lied.
Energy use in the Oval Office..who cares. If you have the money to pay the electric bill you should put it as hot or cold as you want in your home.
Date nite. I agree with you.
Spelling…mine sucks too but I believe PB is on a blackberry without spell checking.
*reality checks Semperfidd*
He lost $43,000 in his couches and the lint trap of his dryer last year, dude. Seriously.
Over several years, Treasury secretary nominee Timothy F. Geithner failed to pay Social Security taxes, even though he was advised by his employer to do so, signed an agreement indicating that he understood that such payments were his responsibility and received extra pay from his employer specifically for that purpose.
Mr. Geithner “came clean” only when he was caught, first by an IRS audit that found he owed Social Security taxes for 2003 and 2004 and then when additional tax liabilities for 2001 and 2002 were discovered after his nomination.
Washington Post…
It wasn’t in his dryer or couch..he purposely didnt pay it.
But you are right about $43,000 not being much money to him.
“He lost $43,000 in his couches and the lint trap of his dryer last year”
`
*runs away and checks lint trap of dryer*
1. “Mistakes” they blatantly didn’t pay them, and it bodes poorly on the person nominating someone without doing homework on them, especially the guy who would be in charge of the IRS, come on, even you have to admit that pretty stupid.
2. He said “We are going to ban all earmarks — the process by which individual members insert pet projects without review,” he explained. “We will create an economic recovery oversight board made up of key administration officials and independent advisors to identify problems early and make sure we are doing all we can to solve it.” Still awaiting that board, and wondering what you call the “pork” projects in the Bill. If it waddles like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it must be a goose.
3. Not quite 80, it’s been said to be possibly 77, but the Obama’s Senior Advisor said “You could grow Orchids in there.” You would like him to be more energy conscious, I would like him to be less hypocritical. I would like him to live up to his standards. During a campaign event in Oregon in May 08, Obama said we have to “lead by example.” “We can’t drive our SUVs and eat as much as we want and keep our homes on 72 degrees at all times,” he said. Really? REAlly? REALLY?
4. It’s not different, unless the President had said, “Everyone in this chamber — Democrats and Republicans — will have to sacrifice some worthy priorities for which there are no dollars, And that includes me.” His 2/24/09 Joint Address to congress, date night was 3/30/09, so I’m guessing a month of sacrifice was enough.
PS: Yes my spelling isn’t great, but still doesn’t mean my logic isn’t sound. And how about this post, I spell everything right?
PS: No bias against fat people (love them, am one), but really the as Semper said putting a fat person in charge of the Health of America, isn’t that kind of like putting an ex KGB member in charge of the CIA.
More like putting Michael Jackson in charge of an orphange….
orphanage!!! (dang blackberry keys!)
1. Okay. Fair enough. That wasn’t his finest moment.
2. I’ll give you that one too. He never should have said “no earmarks.” That’s unrealistic at this point. It’d be nice if he was working towards that. I doubt it, though. We’ll see.
3. Who said it’s like that all the time? At my house, I have to crank the heat way up just to keep my house from freezing. Once it’s nice and warm in there, then I can turn the furnace back down. And geez, are we really nitpicking the thermostat in the Oval Office?
4. Let date night go. I’m not above the president having a fun night out with his wife.
5. I’m guessing things have changed a bit since he took office from things he’s said in the past. Now that he’s in there, he’s seen a lot of how things work, and maybe they’re not what he expected and has to adjust on the fly. Maybe it means he’s not doing things the way he said he would, but with any luck it’s still with the ending goal of helping our country. So I’m gonna give him some slack. I doubt McCain would’ve done any better either.
“I’m guessing things have changed a bit since he took office from things he’s said in the past. Now that he’s in there, he’s seen a lot of how things work, and maybe they’re not what he expected and has to adjust on the fly.”
Are you saying that he wasn’t qualified for the job he was elected to? j/k j/k j/k…seriously though, he was a US senator. He should have a pretty good working knowledge about what is going on. If his past voting record, assuming he read the bills he voted on, is any indication then I would say he is exactly where he wants to be and doing exactly what he wants to be done. Half of America elected a far left democrat and the concequences of that decision is what all America is having to deal with now.
forgive me for going way too much off topic..sry
One possible caveat on the thermostat deal. The White House is one old building. It might be that they have to do that with the thermostat to keep some of the offices/rooms from being ungodly uncomfortable? I have a colleague who wears a down coat in her office in the winter, just because the building’s temperature is poorly balanced.
Of course it could be also that whoever sets the thermostat is a dumb fu(k…
Heck..Clinton used to take his pants off in the Oval Office when he was president. It must have got really hot in there.
They started to “Green Up” the White House in the 90′s. The Oval OFfice was the first room. And Obama is in charge of the thermostat, so per say is Obama a dumb fvck?
I’m watching him right now, and my GOD can the guy walk around a question without answering it. I really really hope this Health Care doesn’t pass.
if the shoe fits.
I work at a college–my colleagues are ‘wicked smaht’ as the students would say. But with respect to practicalities, some of them couldn’t pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the sole.
Yeah, my theory is that old profs don’t die: they just stuff so much specific knowledge in their heads that their brain stems compress and they forget to breathe.
There’s no more room, so common sense drains slowly out the ear canals… if you look closely, you can ALMOST see it getting pushed out…
i want to know who was pissing in bitter trolls boots!
“some of them couldn’t pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the sole.”
`
You’re probably giving them credit by assuming they’d know to begin with that a boot isn’t supposed to be full of piss.
I enjoy your commitment to using wanker
It’s a fun word. Eric comes up with some fun words too. I tried out dick seepage, but just never caught on.
“You, my good sir, are worth less than the puss seepage out of a hooker’s genital wart.”
How’s that?
so much for lunch
Do yourself a favor. DON’T GOOGLE IMAGE THIS
I wasn’t going to. Actually I hadn’t thought about it until you brought it up! Now I’m strangely tempted….but I think I can still resist.
I was curious what one actually looked like, and if they seep, since regular warts don’t.
I’ve seen a lot of medical trauma, but seepies on the peepee make deepie weepie.
Skin disease and STD images: not to be looked at before bedtime. Trust me–bad experience!
My kids are wondering why I’m laughing so hard right now. Too bad I can’t tell them.
“May the fleas of a thousand camels nest in your pubic hair” — old middle Eastern curse
I think Dick Seepage sold me a used car once.
He was my urologist’s assistant, actually…
Was he friends with Dick Trickle, the Nascar driver?
One of my favorite names I’ve run into IRL: Dick Siemens. Yes, that’s how it’s pronounced.
My favorite was in Santa Fe, where I lived for a while. This real estate agent had his signs all over town:
For Sale by Dick Hopping Realtors.
For real.
Fine, but then SAY, “I don’t like your fat doctor”, or whatever, instead of some made-up nonsense about “You’re too popular with your fans” or whatever the Messiah meme is supposed to imply.
~
BTW, I used to work in a hospital, and it absolutely amazed me how many doctors were overweight, and/or smokers.
We’re all gonna die someday, might as well die happeh!
Amen brother….I choose death by sex…with the oposite sex that is.
But that is difficult to achieve if you are overweight and have little lung capacity… Moderation people, moderation…
Nah…just makes it quicker and easier to die.
I wanna die of terminal angel lust
But, you’re already dead.
I wanna die of terminal angel lust. As myself
Awwwww, no cuddling afterwards?
There’s the Morgue to cuddle at.
Shit, man, didn’t you see Little Nicky?
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BOOOIIINNNG!
Brrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!
yous can die of terminal kris angel lust.
Who hurt you bittertroll? Who hurt you!!??
-shows on doll where bad man touched him-
*shows on doll where he touched bad angels*
Reese was a feisty one all right.
I don’t like the fat Surgeon General……
)
Seriously though, I’m tired of the MEssiah montra, but it wasn’t the right who started it. It was the Obama wrship during the campaign, after the election, and the first 100 days in office. It’s worn down some b/c the polish is off and people now see some rust showing through.
I see far fatter nurses and aides at the hospital. My last nurse musta weighed in at 350 at least. Gotta love those fat girls though!!!!!
They can heft heavier, ahem, things…
Plus you have the added bonus of keeping unexpected things from popping up between you during your bedbath
Fat-bottomed girls, you make the rocking world go ’round!
Big girls need lovin’ too, y’all.
Naughty nannies never disappoint
This is exactly my point, ILPB. Precisely what I’m saying. I won’t argue (much) with any of the things you mention, because they’re all things that can be demonstrated to have occurred, however one might choose to interpret them. And I’m quite certain there are going to be many more mistakes, errors in judgment, gaffes, screw-ups, and hypocrisies – it’s the nature of the game.
So why, when there are so many things like this to choose from, do people insist on throwing out:
He’s Muslim
He was born in Kenya
He thinks/his supporters all think he’s the Messiah
He’s going to overturn the Constitution
He’s going to make it illegal to own guns or criticize the government
etc?
You have just illustrated my point. If the things that you mention are so awful (and actually, I think some of them are, even though I think some of the rest of them are simply ridiculous), then why are people so busy making up the bullsh!t?
hoomans have to much free time, they need to get jobs
I know I am not ILPB, but I want my 2 cents in.
It is because they think if they say it enough times, it will become true. They are so hung up on the fact that Obama got elected over their “messiahs” McCain and Palin, that they think it is Obama’s fault for everything in the world today and are trying (and failing) to make up reasons as to why he should not be the president.
Do they consider the fact that the economy is screwed up because of underregulation of private businesses for the past 8 years? No.
Do they consider the fact that our country’s deficit is so high because the Bush Administration’s ridiculous spending on the war, and the tax cuts did not generate enough revenue? No.
These sore losers either don’t want to admit that Bush screwed up big time, or are just that stupid to believe that the Obama administration is actually responsible for the deficit that existed BEFORE he came into office.
However, I am not going to say that only Obama opponents are to blame for our current situation. We citizens as a whole did nothing to prevent this from happening. If anything, we exacerbated it; taking out sub-prime loans, taking risks in the stocks, and overspending on credit is all due to the discretion of the citizens.
However…I still think that because of low taxes, everybody THOUGHT they had the money to spend. It is like some may say, “Liberals may like to tax and spend, but conservatives like to spend and spend.”
cleary its obama’s fault
bekause he is double secret muslim
with crazy preachy friend
oh, and terrerist born in kenya
dats why he refuses to go to war with kenya
McCain and Palin were no prize either but they were, in my opinion, the lesser of two evils.
“Do they consider the fact that the economy is screwed up because of underregulation of private businesses for the past 8 years?”
Which political party was running the shop when most of the decisions not to regulate Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac were decided?
“These sore losers either don’t want to admit that Bush screwed up big time, or are just that stupid to believe that the Obama administration is actually responsible for the deficit that existed BEFORE he came into office.”
No one, to my knowledge is desputing that there was a deficit before Obama came into office. The problem is with the fact that he, yes your Messiah, has quadrupled that debit in his first 6 months.
“However…I still think that because of low taxes, everybody THOUGHT they had the money to spend. It is like some may say, “Liberals may like to tax and spend, but conservatives like to spend and spend.”
Last I checked, it was the Liberals (using this word generally SB, no offense) that just approved trillions of dollars of spending in the so called “stimulus” bill and are trying to do the same for healthcare.
“and are trying (and failing) to make up reasons as to why he should not be the president”
No one that I know of is disputing him fairly being elected as President of the United States. It is just proof to alot of us that the majority of the population is very ill informed or not smartz
Smartz: Here’s my three cents (I win
)
1. You are right, conservatives learned that from the liberals during Bush.
2. The economy sucks because of many many more things than what you said. The deregulation of business was also done under Clinton. Also hate to tell you but the War creates American jobs. Who do you think builds the tanks, fighters, bombs, bullets, etc… Bush wasn’t great, but it wasn’t all his fault. As you said, just b/c you keep saying it doesn’t make it true. Also you can’t get out of credit card debt by spending more on your credit card, exactly how many jobs has this “rushed” Stimulous Bill created.
Love the “However” paragraph, you and I agree there. And the citizens if you were to take the latest numbers only 30% of Americans are Republicans and 47% are Democrats, we can blame the Democrats for the spending too much. (I kid I kid I kid)
I think that your last paragraph is way over simplifying things. I think conservatives would rather cut government programs, and spend mostly on just military, police, fire, ems.. let education be at the State Level.
I take your 3 cents and I up it to 4 cents!
1. Each side always takes jabs at each other, it’s politics. I am not taking sides on who is more of a mudflinger than the other, just explaining why I think people still are hung up on discrediting his legibility to even run as a candidate in the election.
2. I agree, the economy is worsened due to a lot more reasons than I listed, because those I listed were the ones I could come off the top of my head. But to the point of Clinton’s administration allowing deregulation, I honestly didn’t know that (back then I wasn’t really interested in the working of politics and didn’t follow it), but why is it that when Clinton left his terms with the USA in surplus, while after another 8 years of more deregulation (would it be considered OVER-deregulation?) we have a humongous deficit? I still think that the tax breaks on the wealthy (well, on people in general) and businesses were not a good idea to lower during the war, because taxes fund our goverment, who need it to buy materials for those war weapons and pay people, who can then spend on stuff, further improving the economy.
I am not going to say EVERYTHING was Bush’s fault, but rather due to the both the Legislative and Executive branches in general. If anything, I would rather blame things on Cheney for abusing his power (you gotta admit he was a little power hungry) and Rumsfeld for being just a crazy bastard (and doing a lot of selfish and unscrupulous things).
Overall, I think the bipartisanship is just ridiculous in this country in general, which I hope would change soon in the near future. I’m getting sick and tired of all this childish behavior.
Samrtz: I see your four cents and up you to 3 cents… I mean 5 cents, damn math!!
1. I know both sides do attack the other, however I think the left media took it to a brand new level during the Bush/ Cheney tenure and especially on Palin. I hoenstly believe that the Right Wing Pundits have seen the success and are trying it out. Not saying it’s all the liberals fault, I hate mud slinging of any kind, fact slining is much better.
2. Let’s not forget CLinton never actually had a surplus, he had a Budgetted Surplus. Let’s not forget part at the very end of Clinton’s administration the economy was tanking. The .Com bust, the semi-conductor industry, etc which was in part due to the continual slight tax increases by Clinton. Also thank you for caviating the tax breaks were not just for the rich, but everyone. I also get annoyed when people say rich. Define rich in monetary terms. To one person I could be rich, but to other’s I ‘m poor. Also the biggest savings that Mr. Clinton did for this country was cutting the intelligence budget and defense budget. In hind site, not the brightest thing to do.
You know what would be best for this country, and be more economical would be a flat income tax. There would be no loop holes, there would be no deductions, and no skirting by on shoddy laws. Plus you would not be overburdening the middle class, which is what happens, b/c many Democrats believe the middle class = rich.
What we need is a third or fourth party to stand up and be strong. This two party system sucks.
“You know what would be best for this country, and be more economical would be a flat income tax. There would be no loop holes, there would be no deductions, and no skirting by on shoddy laws. Plus you would not be overburdening the middle class, which is what happens, b/c many Democrats believe the middle class = rich.”
I would like a flat tax as well but the problem with doing that is that all of the bottom 50% of income earners would end up paying more than the 2.9% of taxes paid and that will never float.
Well to address your issues.
1. Really it’s only the dumb fvcks who think he’s Muslim and Kenyan, and most say it to get a rile out of people. Also it’s the same thing as people on the left who thought Bush went into Iraq for oil (though there’s no proof of that), or Bush was AWOL during his national guard unit (which was proven false), or Bush held the book upside down even though it was proven to be a doctored photo. It’s just the way the “fundamentalists” are…. so brainwashed they can’t see the facts through the truth.
The MEssiah thing was pretty much built up on both sides. The Righties are reacting to WAY too much hype of Obama (see website I cited before).
He is overturning the constitution as we speak. He overturned the constitution by purchasing majority stocks in GM and Banks.
The Attorney General is on record as saying he wants to license Gun Owners, and reinstitute the ASsault Gun ban. So in a way he is taking guns away. Last time I checked no other Amendment (RIGHT) in the Constitution requires licenses.
I believe his entire first European trip was to criticize American, at least apologize, bow to the Queen, etc….
As earlier people make up the bullshit, like they did with Bush and Palin, to demean the person. Conservatives saw it work on Bush, Cheney and Palin why not give it a shot, however the liberals had the larger bit of media on their side.
Yes because being overweight means you don’t know what it means to be a physician.. which she does.. because she is a physician… Nice Ad Hominem though. Bravo.
She’s a DOCTOR? And she works with OBAMA?! This could discredit our Obama knows nothing about medical procedure costs therefore can’t understand the magnitude of nationalized healthcare options! GO FOR THE FAT, BOYS! MAKE HER CRYYYY!
That’s uh, exactly what I, uh said Igor. Yeah. Uh, right.
only doctor bitter troll trusts is the doctor and his magic police box
I trust Dr. Love.
he gave bitter troll herpes….bitter troll keeps them in jar by bed
And Dr. Pepper.
dr pepper has 42 flavors, no way bitter troll trusts mix breed like that, bitter troll spread hate now
23 flavours.
LIES LIES LIES stop your liberal slander! if you only knew the truth! YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! you live under a unbrella of protection bitter troll provides and then question the way bitter troll provides it?
Iggler <3 The Troll of Grim Bitternessess.
You’re mine, bitter troll. Don’t you ever forget that.
-hides in his hidden bunker in a undisclosed location-
*muffles giggle whilst kneeling behind bitter troll in hidden bunker at undisclosed location*
-Grins and discharges his burnination all into their goddamn bunker-
-roasts marshmellows he picked himself on the marshmellow farm on the pretty dragon fire-
*giggles and steals marshmallows from bitter troll to make s’mores*
Igor you get the location of the hidden bunker from Biden?
He’s a lot better than his cousin, Mr. Pibb.
Dr. Pepper may be a Doctor, but Mr. Pibb is a lawyer with a very good law practice…eer i mean TROLL RAWR OOGA BOOGA
Mr. Pibb is such a doosh. I hate that guy. He came to my house once with his friend Jack Daniels, got wasted, and pissed in my saxophone.
Yeah. Obviously. All us Republicans we’re so conservative we wish we could’ve lived 100 years ago! ha ha…
-whisper-
Stop saying stuff like that! You might blow our cover!
yous go be amish…dat works right? they hireing bitter troll thinks..but bitter troll not trust amish..they up to something..
And if you went to s dentist with rotting teeth would you trust what they say? Or go to a butcher who’s missing some fingers?
Would you go to a fat weight trainer? Or a dentist with no teeth? What happened to Obama’s “lead by example” ideas. The man opens himself up to it, similar to the “Mission Accomplished” Banner by Bush.
santa fat, look how healthy he is, and old, santa really old
Bah, that’s a bunch of malarkey. Just because someone is a hypocrite (which I assume is what you are getting at) doesn’t mean they don’t know their stuff.
Yeah, has no one even considered that this woman’s obesity could be completely unrelated to anything? It’s not like we have absolute proof that she goes around crusading for fitness but secretly eating like 30 Big Macs a day, do we?
old people get fat, well most of them. but dont be fooled the meat is not good eating, get them when they is young
Charro: AS said wouldn’t be so bad if Obama wasn’t touting lead by example all the time. The FRIST time that man leads by example I will be in awe. Then he can reach Messiah levels
Ugh. Spare me the messiah rhetoric.
Like they do for Sarah Palin?
Nah she really is the Wicked Witch of the West (American)
I thought Pelosi was !!!!
I thought I was!
No way Pelosi isn’t human, she’s more of a Demon Spawn of Satan.
I didnt realize it was a big deal for the pres to enjoy a beer.
cause repubwikans get angry if he do anything
same with democraks when bush did anything
i wanna see joe biden shoot someone in the face thou
Poor Joe would probably just shoot himself. *sigh*
then say something stoopid
You mean like : “Barack! The bad bangstick bited me!”
bitter troll dont see obama man hunting..perhaps him and biden guy go play baseket balls and joe shoots someone in da face dat way
“i wanna see joe biden shoot someone in the face thou”
`
Then send him hunting with Dick Cheney and Amy Fisher; between the two of them, it’s a safe bet that somebody’s gonna shoot somebody in the face.
Don’t foget Bill Clinton- he shot Monica…uhhh…you know what I mean.
Didn’t know Superman could do that.
Not Superman- he’s GOD!
What would happen if Obama went up against Chuck Norris?
well since Chuck Norris ALWAYS has more money than you I suppose if they met we could start asking him to pay down all this new debt american has
then he’d roundhouse kick……………. something. I’m not sure where this joke was going
Time to start a flame war. Lets see here, what would be a good troll… oh I know:
“In Soviet US, beer drinks you!”
There, that should do it.
A little help here – Obama thinks he’s God.
Cite please.
A little more feeling please? That’s the best flame you can do?
I wasn’t flaming. I was asking for some evidence that our President thinks he’s god. And I’m still waiting.
ooooooooo, better, you’re improving…
Still waiting.
Still annoying.
Still trolling.
Oh come on, surely you’re not serious? Next time he’s on the news and it’s raining, watch, he can walk on water!
I’m totally serious. And don’t call me Shirley.
The hospital??? What is it????
You mean… we’re going to have to blow ROC?
Have you ever been in a Turkish prison, Billy?
Seriously, weak, dude. Obama doesn’t think he’s God, and neither do his supporters. Get over yourself.
yakov smirnoff said that
in soviat russah obama think yous god
Little more help here… Obama IS GOD!!ONE!!!11
Thanks! I’m gonna need more help I think.
We’re gonna need a bigger boat.
Win.
Here’s to swimmin’ with bow-legged women!
Dammit, you guys are having fun here…
We have limited time before Obama destroys the world, so we’re enjoying it now. **Sung to Row Tow Row your boat**
)
Troll troll troll a comment,
Gently on the blog,
Merrily Merrily Merrily
Life is all but done.
Well, he can’t screw up Health Care now for awhile, so now he’s trying to screw up the School system ….more.
Okay, here’s why I enjoy this one so much; it pokes fun not so much at B.O. himself but satirizes the more fanatical Democrats that worship the ground he walks on, and begin to attribute god-like abilities to their ‘chosen one’.
Oh, and how this HUMOR site is taken equally as Gospel by a (thankfully) small portion of the Republican proponents and then complain, incapable of understanding sarcasm and satire, making them look all the more foolish (but unfortunately, also making their smarter cohorts look bad).
see other posts above, but to recap: You might be missing the point. It seems to me that it pokes fun at people who believe there are any “fanatical Democrats that worship the ground he walks on, and begin to attribute god-like abilities to their ‘chosen one’.”
I live in a city of almost a million which voted about 85% for Obama, I have friends who worked on his campaign, I hang out online with some seriously (and scarily, to be honest) diehard Democrats, and I have never met anyone who thinks that way, nor anyone who’s ever even *heard* of someone who thinks that way. The only place I have *EVER* encountered it, is as an “accusation” from anti-Obama/Republican/Conservative/right-wing people.
When you have to point it out….*sigh*
Yes, this is making fun of the right-wing for repeatedly asserting that there are Obama followers that believe he’s some sort of deity, there simply aren’t any. I have yet to see evidence that anyone on the left actually thinking he’s a messiah.
Sorry Jaded, the joke’s on you pal.
obamamessiah dot blogspot dot com.
parody dot ftw at you dot imbecile
Looking at it more. Not really a Pardoy, more like actual cases of liberals alluding to Obama is some sort of Messiah. People asked where it came from, well here it is, in black and white, and STILL refuted. What does someone have to do to have people admit, it’s both sides doing it?
With this citation at the top of the page, it had most definitely better be parody, with some extra bitter mocking for anyone out there stupid enough to actually think he’s the friggin’ messiah…
“… a light will shine through that window, a beam of light will come down upon you, you will experience an epiphany … and you will suddenly realize that you must go to the polls and vote for Obama” – Barack Obama Lebanon, New Hampshire.
January 7, 2008.
He was actually explaining that this was NOT how it was going to be for voters, but the full context was neatly removed so as to give the words new meaning. So either this site is dedicated to parody, or libel…
sry I cant be funner about this, but my sense of humor was long ago broken by the inanity: I actually received an automated opinion poll that asked questions like, “Are you aware that Obama is a namby-pamby mama’s boy who likes Arab men and will sell your house to the first Iranian terrorist who bids on it?” (question has been modified slightly to induce amusement in the reader).
“And we will reveal our boobies, and the holy light will shine upon them, and they shall become Sacred Boobies…”
is funny site, though. thx 4 sharing.
You are welcome. Just showing you were the conservative pundits got Obama = Messiah. There is a lot of ammunition there.
ok, I’ll let you win on the “there’re some wack-jobs on the left” argument. my point was that the site is dedicated to mocking them, I missed the part where you were not putting forth the site as a place where those who deserve to be mocked go to be taken seriously. my bad.
Let him win? Dude. Have you BEEN to Huff-Po?
Not let. I did win. I was just showing that it wasn’t all conservatives that came up with Obama = Messiah, we had ammunition. Just like they had plenty of ammunition the Bush is a retard.
Funny site!
Geez…I guy just can’t enjoy a beer without getting shit, can he?
*a guy
geez…I need to go back to bed.
*shrugs* He’s president. When you’re president, people make fun of you. I mean, if you look back on this site, there’s a sh*t load of lols making fun of Bush. So, it’s only fair that a few captions poke some fun at the president, no?
But Bush made it so EASY…
put yourself in the spotlight, expect praise and tomatos from people.
if you cant take either or both, get out of the spotlight
When life gives you tomatoes, make pizza.
This is dated 3/2/2009. WTF? Why are we recycling lols? Is the economy THAT bad?
good catch, I guess server space isn’t what it used to be
It is an attempt to save mental energy, so as not to add to the dependence on foreign carbon emissions.
That lil kid next to him has a future as a yoga master.
that would have made a good caption me thinks
All little kids are bendy like that.
i’m not a little kid, and i’ve got arthritis, but i can still sit like that. yay for double-jointed-ness and the ability to pop my hip out of place. you’d be surprised how comfortable sitting like that is sometimes too.
If you’re a girl, I’m in love!
NO!! SHE’S MIIIIINE!!!!!11!!2!!
you in love with 9 year old asian boy?
That’s short round, champ.
And since you already ate him, no.
bitter troll make him call bitter troll Dr. Jones, as me feasted on his flesh
“Eat me, Dr. Jones, eat me faster!!???”
-
-
I… I simply have no where to put that. If you’ll excuse me a moment, I do believe I must vomit explosively in my garbage can now. You might want to stand downwind.
Crinkle crinkle!!
The horny judges scores it a 9.995!!!
Since you were talking to me, I get first dibs.
*wines and dines*
Hey, babeh
Best comment by far. No way it could be twisted into something controversial.
Or is there? See that poor crippled boy? See? Obama’s health plan does not work!!
Damn, trollin’ ain’t easy.
Nah- he’s mad Obama took his beer from him and told him to ” spead the Ale”.
The only lols we get against Obama are for the “messiah” nonsense? Is it because he’s black that we don’t get some biting lols about the bad things he has done? What ever happened to equal opportunity? This site must be run by the Klan who hate blacks or the Democrats who want to keep blacks down with the soft racism of lower expectations.
I don’t think klan members have the psychological background to use reverse psychology. Considering my run ins with them usually consist of
“hey you! Wanna hate mexicans with us? Oh well, if there’s time we’ll hate those blacks too”
THe mental image of a Klansman running down the road trying to get people to join him in hating Mexicans made me giggle a little.
imagine the quote in a REALLY redneck voice and it might be even funnier
I did, that’s why I’m giggling. I’m from the country, man, and we have those guys out there!
-
I’m also imagining Clayton Bixby screaming “white powr” at the guys trying to trash his truck.
W00t more country people, I still get invites to the klan rally!!!!1!
I’m just like “naw man”
“well ok you can disagree with me long as you’re white, LATER HONKEY *blasts rap music*”
“Hot shower! Hot shower! Hot shower!”
And now it’s time for you to put your little foil hat back on. That’s a good conspiracy theorist. *pat pat*
O_O If you want biting lols about him, then make biting lols about him.
Normally, I would also add “and make them funny so they’ll make the front page” but the level of humor on front page lols has dropped to an abysmally low level lately…
So kid, you say you want to be president when you grow up? Well that’s just the Democratic regime oppressing you with their lowered expectations. You only want to settle for merely being the president of the United States because you’ve been programmed to think that’s all you can aspire to. Stick with us kid and we’ll show you what your real potential is.
Right, you can be president of the WORLD!!!
Dictator for life?
*offers dissi an “s”*
Hee hee.
Sure! Why put limits?!
This is a much better flame war starting up down here… Stay tuned.
you fool! i said “butt light!”
Where’s the Messiah joke in this? Everybody with kidneys can drink beer and turn it into water.
If the messiah wills it, yes. But you must get permission, and have your forms filled out beforehand, in triplicate.
Until that time you have to hold it.
I don’t think I can hold it in that long!!
I’m sorry miss, please get back in line. NEXT!!
its that jesus could preform miracles like turning things into other things… the person meant that he would change it to water while its still in the cup, not through biological means
Sarcasm recognition fail.
Yeah, I got that. I was making a silly pee joke, as opposed to my usual lofty heights of dignity that limits itself to dick and fart jokes.
/facepalm
GOD!!!!! i friken hate this whole obama messiah image that he has… man whoever made this is the biggest idiot that has ever lived
Sarcasm recognition double fail.
/headdesk
It’s funny and topical… but it makes fun of poor, little Obama … so people vote it down.
If people vote it down, how the hell did get to the frontpage, hmmm?
So…what I’ve taken from all of this is that most of ya’ll don’t like Obama which leads me to say this-YAY!! ^_^
No, I think you may be projecting. What you should be getting is nobody here honestly thinks Obama is God.
there is no god, if you disagree then you can prove bitter troll wrong by provideing his mailing address
1400 Pennsylvania Ave NW
Washington, DC 20500
Oh wait that’s his new prophet’s address **Sing Troll song from up above, but it had ot be done** Here’s God’s
123 St Pete’s Gate Way
Heaven, Universe 00007
Or you can call him
Everyone knows God’s address is unlisted because he’s trying to duck the process server. Worked, too!
Almost there… you missed a ” at the end of the html address, probably…
DOH! http address.
I think I missed the first “>”…
Yup. I checked the source code
When I get sloppy I miss the second “, so I ASS U ME D.
bitter troll tried that address, kept getting ” person does not live here” mailed back to bitter troll
But you’re a troll, all your mail gets returned. It’s like when a vampire looks in the mirror and sees no reflection. Same principal.
Trolls don’t have principals. They don’t attend school.
That’s a travesty!! A TRAVESTY!! We need to raise public awareness of this.
awareness makes me bitter
But you’re already bitter, so no problem.
But not bitter enough. You need to go to Remedial Bitterness in Troll University. Prof. Grumpy Old Troll from Dora the Explorer is the instructor I believe.
I’m betting Jane would disagree with you; I think she’s had a few trolls in class.
As have I. Trolls go to college, too. Sigh.
Shall I bring up Sexual Harassment Boy again?
Should I release “The hounds” dear?
Storytime please?
Sexual harrassment will not be tolerated, however it will be graded.
But we do go to frat parties. Drunk girls don’t seem to notice you’re a troll at those things.
edukation is impoten for trolls two
I’m not impotent. Speak for yourself.
But my link didn’t. One more time…
I totally remember this… whatta precedent, eh?
Lol!!
He’s on Missouri’s No Call list. I checked. That’s one guy you REALLY don’t want to call accidentally.
“Sir, I’d like to talk to you about upgrading your Charter cable to…AAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!! Dude, how’d the lightning bolt get inside my cubicle???????”
Argh, “I Like Peanut Butter” wrote 1400 Pennsylvania. Why is God at the Willard hotel? (The while house is 1600 Pennsylvania.)
cause god likes lil soaps? wait no he dont, he not real. now toof fairy is real. and she is HAWT
I know. Obama learned from Kennedy and Clinton, he’s taking his extra circular activities across the street.
/ Troll Sarcasm…
you sayz obama and toof fairy is doing baaaaaad things in hotel room cross street?
With toys and small defenseless woodland creatures.
And lil soaps in the shape of seashells.
Wet them just enough and the slide so nicely in your hiney-hole.
*wouldn’t know from experience*
“if you disagree then you can prove bitter troll wrong by provideing his mailing address”
`
OK, then.
bitter troll’s mailing address:
Secret Hideout # 77
in Southwest Cave
Under Bridge
Troll-Landia 66666-6666
if no one at home, UPS please leave packages on porch
This belongs in the FAIL blog! Drinking right beside a kid! Way to go, Pres…. what a way to show our future children how responsible you are…..
I’m sorry, rest of PK, but Samantha you’re a doosh. It would only be irresponsible if he were underage. Which he is not. So he is being responsible demonstrating that only those of age should be allowed to drink.
Gah it’s not like he’s all wasted peeing on the wall or something.
Doosh.
Yeah, is he giving the beer to the kid? Hell no. Beer is not evil.
“what a way to show our future children how responsible you are…..”
`
*clutches pearls*
Won’t somebody PLEASE think of the children??
`
Also, what are “future children”? Newborns?
Y’ALL NIGGAS POSTIN’ IN A TROLL THREAD
You should keep yourself off the site forever.
Keep 4chan to itself, and leave us to our own. We don’t want that shit here.
C-C-C-C-C-C-C-C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER
Alright.
Go back to humiliating an autistic man on the internet, 4chan!
It’s all right, I think I’ll survive without you.
Y’ALL TROLL POSTIN’ IN A NIGGAS THREAD
*snort*
WHAT OTHER KINDA POSTEN YOU WANT ME TO DO???????????
IM A FRIGGEN TROLL!!!!
Our 4chan spray is wearing off. Someone go spray the perimeter again. It says it works up to 6 months, but it’s only been 2. Damn cheap spray.
he is only a man.
NO … he is THE BARACK OBAMA !!!
bitter troll drinks bitter beer while thinking about the bitter future children
cool story bro
The only “president” that will die of cirrhosisc of the liver. Yea looks cool to drink doesn’t it Barack Hussein Obama Junior?
WOW…. Barack has mastered the art of reverse urination.
thing is he will turn it to water
correct me if im wrong but i thought muslims cant drink alcohol
stop fighten you too, when elder god cthulhu returns he will devower us all
then we all be fine