You don’t have to be Admiral Ackbar to work out that…
IT’S A TRAP!!!!!!!!!
(Soldier sized mousetrap)
Picture by: dunno source Caption by: new_lizard via Advanced Lol Builder
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First to sing “Joy to the world!”
Jeremiah was a bull frog
Was a good friend of mine
I never understood a single word he said
But I helped him a-drink his wine
And he always had some mighty fine wine
Singing
Joy to the world
All the boys and girls, now
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me
If I were the King of the world
Tell you what I’d do
I’d throw away the cars and the bars and the wars
And make sweet love to you
Sing it now
Joy to the world
All the boys and girls
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me
You know I love the ladies
Love to have my fun
I’m a high night flier and a rainbow rider
And a straight-shooting son of a gun
I said a straight-shooting son of a gun
Joy to the world
All the boys and girls
Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea
Joy to you and me
So you attempted (miserably) to ordinal yourself….. wow skizo say who?
Nope. Singin’ about Jeremiah and Joy!
If you’re gonna try and insult someone, you might wanna use the right spelling of the word you’re attempting to slam someone with, schizo-man.
LULZ!!
BURN
INTRNTS = SUPR SRS BZNS!!!!!!
Wow looky someone making fun of my spelling, obviously not a regular. You’re dismissed now!! On your way… shoo shoo away now… scamper off..
SRS. FKNG. BZNS!!!!!
DAMN IT!!! It’s back… I thought I said shooo….. and at least I can write complete sentences without resorting “Texting Speech”. I don’t think Three Dog Night would approve.
“… and at least I can write complete sentences without resorting [to] “Texting Speech”…”
So close and yet, miss again.
I am cracking up here, reading your self-defeating statements.
Go, give us more!
ILPB, you are attracting the trolls in droves today. Are you wearing Axe Body Spray eau du trolle?
Quite contrary, he failed miserably at trolling (twice) and was called on it.
Now you are trying to troll a bit yourself. But whatever floats your boat.
Artsa
You’re not getting it are you? ILBP is a regular here on this site. Everyone is already used to his spelling errors and it’s not that big of a deal. You, coming out of nowhere attacking him personally, is the reason why YOU are the actual troll here.
I know, I know. ILPB went after Hey first. But Hey’s ordinal post was GARBAGE. It sucked. Badly. Ordinal posts should at least be funny or informative. His was just…blah.
So, get it straight my man. In this scenerio, you’re the one trolling.
Know, he called me a troll!!! I don’t even have a bridge. *runs off crying*
{{Nucky}} [Starts building her a bridge]
*sniffle* Thanks, paws.
*Throws a number of bottles underneath the bridge to make it look authentic*
Actually, this may take a while. I’m not used to using rainbows as construction materials, and I’m not sure about this name Bifröst either!
Wino, are they full bottles?
That’s okay, Paws. I can wait.
They were before I threw them ( I quickly consummeddd them firrrrssstt). Don’t worry. There are many, many more. I would wear shoes below your bridge for some time though, unless you have thick troll feet.
Wino you drunk, now how are we supposed to get the PK ladies drunk?
How’s that? But, I don’t really think I want to be a troll….trolls are nasty aren’t they?
Down, Andy! I’m a good troll, one of the ones you CAN’T eat……..my brains, anyway.
Wait, if he can’t eat your brains, what can he…never mind.
I can tell your mind is on hockey, Rando.
USA Women’s and Canadian Women’s gonna be a GREAT Game. I have a sneaky feeling it’ll be Canada VS US in Men’s too….. What a GREAT Olympics in terms of Hockey, and you Canucks have like 7 Golds at home.
The Americans have already played so well. I think they’ll win this semi-final game, but I don’t care if they do or don’t win the gold medal game. Just making it there beat the odds. A silver would be a huge victory for American hockey (and my boys Erik Johnson & David Backes, Blues players).
Nucky, my mind rotates between 4 things: hockey, boobies, food, and video games. Any time I can combine any of those is also a win.
I know, guys! I’m so freakin’ excited about how we’ve done so far in all the sports. I can’t tell you how much it would mean to we Canadians if we took Gold in both men’s and women’s hockey on home ice. It would be just…….I don’t know, it’s that big.
Nucky: We’ll give you one out of two, but I would prefer the Women’s US get Gold, you know that avenge Torino and all.. sorry.
Unfortunately I’ve heard that the blowouts in women’s hockey this year could mean the demise of it for next Olympics.
Women’s hockey doesn’t seem to meet the standards for an Olympic sport, no. I have no idea what “the blowouts” are, but when a team that loses 9-1 in one game makes it to the bronze game, the quality isn’t good enough widely enough, I think.
Oh, and 13-1 in another one. Pffft.
Nucky: Congrats on the win.
Nucky’s the hottest troll I’ve ever seen…. now are the Curvy Troll? Take off Eh Troll? Or the Take off Eh I’m Curvy Troll?
Aw, thanks ILPB!
*is conflicted*
Suddenly your brains look so tasty…
Psst,……Andy, see my comment above ILPB, I replied in the wrong place.
Troll tactic #12: When a regular attacks a troll, call that person a troll instead. This will lead to endless arguing over something silly. This tactic depends on the actual troll insisting repeatedly that the regulars are the troll, not it, despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary.
eh quit yer trolling you trolly troll!
Successful troll is successful.
(Now watch, some dipsh!t is gonna post that stupid youtube video of successful troll, that’s troll tactic #15)
[Insert Troll'd Hard youtube video clip here]
Rando, you just proved that you are indeed Awesome.
Don’t encourage me. My ego is inflated enough already.
Ego what ego? It totally fits behind Rush Limbaugh’s a$$!!!!
If my ego was as big as an RV it could still fit behind Limbaugh’s ass. (For conservative version of this joke, please insert “Al Gore” where Limbaugh is.)
Who siad your ego isn’t? Besides I’m a conservative and I amke fun of Limbaugh… guy’s an entertainer, he certainly ain’t a fact user.
Just like Olbermann to liberals, he appeals to that meaner side of conservatives that doesn’t like to play nice with the other side.
I’m a Rachel Maddow fan. She’s sharp, and only a LITTLE mean.
A little?
Ivan: She’s also about as bright as a 2 Watt Lightbulb, without filament……. seriously dude.. I put her on par with Palin in terms of “My GOD will you just STFU”
ILPB, you know not of which you speak. Yes, she is extremely smart. You do know that she is a Rhodes Scholar, right? That means she actually completed her education.
So just because someone is a “regular”, they are automatically pardoned from being a troll when they act like one?
And you claim “overwhelming evidence” of me trolling? At least back it up with something other than wild claims – I called the troll out – I don’t care if he is a regular or not, he came out swinging and embarassed himself badly, and got called out for it. Just because his buddys here feel the need to rush to his defense, acting like trolls themselves (as you just did), does not mean that I trolled or that I am wrong.
But I guess you assume that whoever screams loudest, wins.
Sad.
I’m afraid that, at best, you’re proving you’re a newbie. Some of us, like ILPB and myself, are most assuredly not buddies, but respect each other for at least being able to form and voice an opinion on political matters.
Which in all replies to my posts, was severly lacking. Only personal attacks, opinions, wild claims, no actual arguing.
You just assume I am a newbie for calling you buddies when in fact you all draw together to do the thing you claim someone who is not a regular supposedly did: Troll. No respect, no sensible discussion. Only attempts at putting others down by claiming implicitly you and your group are superior.
I have yet to see one attempt at actually discussing. And posts like “Knowledge1ne”‘s are pure and simple troll posts – just personal attacks and opinions, aimed at provoking. And because he supposedly is a “regular”, it is not trolling?
Double-standards, but I already see arguing with you bunch is useless.
What would you like to discuss then? I think the soldier is probably Belgian.
Here we see troll tactic #7 in action: sour grapes. AKA the “Screw you guys, I’m going home” tactic. This is a fascinating specimen, and I require further study.
Paws: Wait? We’re not buddies? But you said you’d repsect me in the morning!!! Aww you suck!! **walks off to tie Artsa (what kind of name is that anyhows) to a target so Mabs and Nucky can use him for target practice**
Artsa: Dude liberals are backing my arse up, so that just proves you be in the wrong. I really can’t say anymore than they did, except what I said to Hey… shoo, run off go on, go play with the other school children.
‘Tis the same ol same ol same ol song that has gone on for at least two years…. says the old grunt.
Why I was a pup when paws and rando were new and then assimilated and if you hang around artsa, you will be assimilated, too.
Yeah, but I didn’t start out like that. I think I started out when someone didn’t like my front page LOL and commented that I should die or something. My totally not angry response was that such a sentiment made my day.
Here we see troll tactic #12 in action. Please note the deliberate claim that regular ILPB is a troll, and that other regulars who come to his defense (such as Kn0w, Nucky, and myself) are trolls. And once again is denying its own trolldom by overlooking overwhelming evidence. Also note the use of troll tactic #3, moral superiority. Superior troll is superior. Let’s see what it does next.
Neither did I threaten to go home (sour grape theory), nor did I see one shread of “overwhelming evidence”. Still only seeing attempts to avoid the discussion by just discounting me as a troll (another troll tactic btw)
Now THAT is a troll tactic. But feel free to dispute me with actual evidence.
Troll tactic #6: projection is a very important part of troll tactic #12.
Look, Artsa, if you’re not a troll, then stop acting like one. Joining in out of nowhere and insulting a regular, no matter how you think he’s behaving is trollish behavior. You want to post here and not get snarked at then tone it down a bit. Otherwise, all you’re doing is proving my point over and over and over again. You have done EVERYTHING that I have described in “troll tactic #12.”
Well, we can go back and forth for ages calling each other Trolls.
All my subsequent posts have been reasonable and argued. I was not provided the same courtesy. And you are just as guilty of tactic #12 that you claim I am following.
I (a non-regular) called someone a troll. The response was to call me a troll. Tactic #12, right? But regulars are immune?
When you are ready to argue like normal people, I am up for that. Just claiming I am using some troll tactic everytime I put forth an argument is in itself a troll tactic.
I don’t want to call you a troll but I do want to point out the hypocricy in this approach.
All my posts have been “toned” down – and posting frequency is not a prerequisite to voicing opinions or having common sense or sensible judgement as some claim.
Regular or not, everyone in this discussion (including me of course) acted trollish.
You can label this a new troll tactic if you like.
I don’t think that I acted trollish. I don’t think Nucky did either for that matter.
Rando: Awesomness!!! **hands Rando a Sam Adams**
Artsa: See I wasn’t trolling, I wasn’t looking for responses, hence trolling. I was just calling out Hey for posting something utterly more useless than an EWAdams preachy LOL. Hey’s post was neither witty, funny, nor original, and I called him/her/it out on it. The response making fun of my grammar and spelling in return was a trollish comment, hence the reason he/she/it was dismissed. If you notice, most people on here (except you and Hey) are defending me… and trust many of the ones defending me love to get an occasional joke at my expense. Also ANYONE on here using “Text Speech” or LOLCat speech not in the context of sarcastically using it are almost instantly dismissed as a Troll.
Argue like normal people???? You ARE new here.
Rando: This I will conceede.
ILPB: You just prove again and again that you are just not mentally ready for big boy talk, once you get to school age, that may change! (Yes that was just as trollish has his replies but what the heck – if he acts like a small child who ran to mommy and got the “There there”, I will make fun of it all I want)
Aww how cute…. the Troll knows me after one message board….. Guys, guys…. can someone please teach me to speak Big Boy…. preferably with a burger and fries!!!
I accept your concession. Wait, why are you conceding?
Because you’re awesome, Rando.
**whining** But he made fun of meeeeeeeeee…….. Rando can you use you awesomness of concession to help me… the Troll hurt my feelings… I has a sad
Oh. Well shouldn’t everyone be conceding then?*
*For those of you out there who take me too seriously, I’m not really that conceited. I’m actually quite modest. Yay for the Interwebs and the chance to be cool!
Conceding? I thought we were seceding….Damn!t, I always get these things wrong.
Someone insulting your spelling certainly. I’ll concede to making fun of your spelling occasionally, but generally only when it results in a Freudian Slip, Malapropism or Spoonerism.
But at least I write somewhat complete sentences, and you don’t do it RIGHT off the bat. Or is it Text Speak day? or is it s’peaches for Paws day?
Well, it was not a spelling problem per se, more of a comprehension problem on your side about the big word you were trying to use.
This in combination with wanting to sound superior and put the previous poster “in his place” so to speak, makes it a hillarious self-defeating troll attempt.
And subsequently, proving “Hey”‘s point by taking the “Internet Business” (a.k.a. INTRNTS BZNS) too serious, another self defeating rebuttal attempt which is not helped by your need to justify that you are able to achieve the minimum conversational level to pass as Human.
Rock on!
Okay, why is it pick on ILPB day?
Why not?
…
Can’t argue with that logic.
Blutarski??
Back the fsck off my ILPB *licks Peanut Butter and runs off*
See this is where I could throw out the “B/C I slep with so and so’s mom/ wife/ daughter/ grandma/ uncle’s wife, but really it wouldn’t be that witty. Maybe it’s b/c they’re threatened by my looks. Yeah that’s it.
Jeremiah & Joy? Who are they?
I believe they went up a hill or something??!?!?!
To drink Jeremiah’s mighty fine wine?
(I don’t get posting the entire lyrics to that song, I mean, why that song?)
Well, because it’s an obvious reference to the picture with the soldier and the giant mousetrap and Ackbar….and, yeah, I got nothing.
Ackbar was a bull frog?
Oh…that’s a possibility. I’d be more inclined to think that Jeremiah, the bull frog, was actually Ackbar’s real father!
Now you’re just being absurd!!! You Take Off, Eh I’m Curvy Troll you…
Um….um……*boobie flash* There, I’ve run circles around you with my logic!
I like circular logic….
“Ackbar was half bullfrog, was the son of a friend of mine…”
I’m not a big fan of us continually calling poor Jeremiah a bullfrog.
Was he a Meninite or Amish frog instead?
Maybe French?
I believe he was a mountain man…or governor of Missouri. One of the two.
I am curious what led this thought to pop into your head. Why “Joy to the World”? Why not something having to do with mouse traps, soldiers Admiral Akbar, or beer?
The only think I can think of would be perhaps the firster was listening to the song at the time?
*convulses from trying to think like a troll*
Okay, okay! I’ve learned my lesson!
That guy was on here trying to get that Beer months ago. Typical government work. Take an easy task and drag it out so it takes an unusually long time.
Hey he didn’t fill out is W-N8675.4450 Form correctly so it got pushed to the bottom of the pile, so he had to wait until it cleared before going for that beer again.
You know if the govt had less forms to fill out, write in plain English, and made the paper out of hemp, I’m sure it would cut billions from the budget & govt waste.
But then the paper companies, paper pushers, and form checkers would all be out of jobs, and the economy would collapse….. SEE SOCIALISM!! ELEBENITY!!!
Our government is already “paperless”. So they claim.
It’s a huge lie. They fax us crap all the time, and require us to fax rather than e-mail form corrections.
Well duh, fax doesn’t keep the “paper” trail if there’s a mistake.
Besides half the government’s too old to use E-Mail!!!
Well they could all work for da ebil Mary-Jawana Corporations, drop out of high school, and become lazy stoners who contribute nothing to America but far left, Marxist, Stalinist, Muslinist propaganda.
UPTEENTH!!
Our soldiers can’t repel a microbrew of that magnitude!!!
Now witness the Hops of this Warm brewed and Bottled Micro Brew!!!
Your skunky beer is your weakness.
And your faith in your Miller Light is yours!
I can’t even be Guinness to understand that.
Well Bud, you need to get weiser.
Pabst true for ale of us.
But it sure is a Beast of a challenge.
Mich el lob a 6-pack into it.
I’m gonna Boxer ears, if you guys don’t stop this pun run right now.
Can we wait till we get Steaming (Scots synonym for drunk, and there really is a Steam brewery in Newquay, Cornwall).
Hey, Bud, light-en up, we have Steam Whistle here.
I smell someone’s Bush!
Buuuusch!!! screwed that up didn’t I
Reach out with your right arm; drink the Caley 80/-!
I am an Alky,
Like my father before me
Now your transformation to the dark ale is complete.
You drink that thing?
You’re braver than I thought?
“You’re braver than I thought?”
Is that a question? No, I’m not braver. I hate that sh!t.
PSST “You fly that thing? You’re braver than I thought!” I know not Return of the Jedi, but still in the AWESOME STar Wars Trilogy.
I suspect that the Acme Corporation is somehow involved with this.
Hee!
This is the lol that just keeps giving, isn’t it? If anyone is anal enough to go through the archives, I would wager this one has been on the front page at least a half dozen times. I suspect this will not be the last we see of this grunt and his beer.
HIC BURP !!!!
Yeah! Nothing burps like beer. Not even Dr Pepper. Now that’s satisfaction!
Nothing burps better than bacon!!
That water looked pretty tastey..
I love bacon burps, lots of flavor. But beer burps have both volume and flavor. Especially Michelob.
The rare hiccup-burp! I’ve heard about these before. But until now, I had never really known if they truly existed or not.
You obviously have never been drunk correctly then.
I think you should change your name to reflect your new and exalted status. “Patriarch Pirate”?
either I have a new goal in life, or i’m already too good at it
If you get to the Expert stage you will also get the V-Hic-Urp… which is a Vurp + Hic-Up, totally YUMMY!!! Did that the same night I got my tattoo.
I must have missed something…what’s a vurp?
Vomit-Burp. You know when you burp and a little vomit comes up.
Oh. Right. Those are…odd.
It’s a trap. Get an axe.